ÐÓ°ÉÔ­´´

Chasing Road Runner over a cliff, Wile E. Coyote hovers among the disappearing
clouds until he realises there is nothing to support him; only then does
he plummet to the ground. In the Looniverse, gravity affects only those
who notice it. During a chaotic garden chase, Sylvester the Cat is clobbered
with a spade and his face becomes shovel-shaped. In the cartoon world, shape
and form are easily altered. Despite double-checking for trains, Daffy Duck
is run over as he steps onto the tracks. Nobody in the world of Looney Toons
obeys the laws of physics – or so it might seem.

But new, looney toon analysis reveals that these, seemingly nonsensical,
phenomena can be described by logical laws similar to those in our world.
Nonsensical events are by no means limited to the Looniverse. Laws that
govern our own Universe often seem contrary to common sense. Quantum theory,
for example, provides countless cases of counter-intuitive phenomena, but
it applies in our Universe on the very small scale.

And the Looniverse seems to obey some quantum laws on a much larger
scale. Take quantum tunnelling. This allows tiny particles like electrons
to pass through otherwise impenetrable barriers. If quantum theory applied
to cartoon characters, or toons, highly energetic toons could not be confined
in closed spaces for any length of time. And indeed Bugs Bunny has no difficulty
tunnelling out of a chained and padlocked casserole dish placed in a sealed
oven.

Another quirky quantum phenomenon is wave-particle duality. This says
quantum objects can behave like particles, bouncing off each other, or like
waves, passing through and combining with each other. In our world only
very small particles like electrons and photons can have wave-like properties
and the more energy they have, the longer their wavelength. If the theory
of the quantum Looniverse is correct, energetic toons should behave like
waves as well. This explains why Wile E Coyote can never catch the far more
energetic and wave-like Road Runner. According to theory, Road Runner can
never be in one place long enough to be eaten. For the same reason, Road
Runner passes unharmed through ACME Inc devices which are always triggered
by the much less energetic, but more massive, Coyote.

Wave-particle duality also explains why Sylvester the Cat’s face bears
the imprint of the shovel but regains its normal shape later. Quantum waves
in the Looniverse behave like solitons. These are waves that ‘remember’
their shape when they collide and return to their original form afterwards;
just like toon faces.

But not all phenomena can be explained by quantum theory. In fact there
is a whole class of ‘reverse’ phenomena which produce the effects opposite
to those in our quantum world. ÐÓ°ÉÔ­´´s argue that in the quantum world
the sheer act of observation can cause an event to occur. In the Looniverse
some things happen only if they are not observed. For example, when Daffy
Duck checks that no buffaloes are in sight before passing a sign marked
‘Buffalo Crossing’, he is immediately crushed by an advancing herd.

Another reverse quantum effect is the ‘teamwork’ observed between two
unrelated objects. For example, bullets fired from Porky Pig’s shotgun always
chase Daffy Duck into the distance, even if he changes direction. A safe
rigged to fall onto a large X, will hit the spot, even if the X or the safe
are moved. Quantum theory in the real world links particles like this, but
only after they have met and parted. In the Looni-verse, objects act in
concert even before they meet.

Dynamite theory

Although the Looniverse appears to be essentially quantum in nature,
effects predicted by Einstein’s theory of relativity can be observed too.
In the real world time passes more slowly for an object travelling close
to the speed of light; an effect known as time dilation. When accelerated
almost to the speed of light, particles with naturally short life spans
live for much longer. The same effect is observed in the Looniverse when
the fuse on a stick of dynamite burns more slowly as it is passed rapidly
from Yosemite Sam to Bugs Bunny. The faster it moves, the more slowly the
fuse burns. The dynamite explodes only when it is stationary and the fuse
burns normally.

The major effect explained by relativity is the conversion of energy
to matter, suitably demonstrated when Droopy is hit by a highly energetic
anvil, generating small birds and stars. Energy from the im-pact is converted
into matter – birds and stars – and then converted back to energy when the
birds and stars disappear. Obviously, birds and stars are produced because
they are fundamental particles and, theoretically, impacts of greater energy
should produce other particles.

Relativity theory predicts several other effects for toons travelling
close to the speed of light. The toon should shrink along the direction
of motion, for example, and its mass should increase considerably, but there
is little evidence for either of these effects. Speedy Gonzales does not
seem squashed along his direction of motion nor does his mass increase,
despite near instantaneous acceleration and enormous velocity. Clearly,
the Looni-versal speed of light is so high that Speedy and other toons never
travel fast enough to produce these effects.

But relativity and quantum effects are not the only toon phenomena;
observations also provide evidence of some eerie electrical and magnetic
effects. Electricity in toonland does not require a conducting material,
for example, nor is a complete circuit necessary. Tom the toon-cat is
electrocuted even though he does not touch the ground and stores enough
electricity to power a light bulb seconds later. Matter in the Looniverse
is very good at storing charge, a property known as capacitance in our world.

The properties of toon-magnets are also strange. Toon-magnets can be
aimed in one direction and work over large distances whereas real magnets
operate over short distances and in all directions. Designed by a mad toon
professor, a toon-magnet on Earth can exert a force on a flying saucer outside
the Solar System. This, and the fact that toon-magnets can be turned on
and off, can be explained by assuming that toon energy stimulates the magnet
to produce powerful magnetic beams. In our world, the same type of stimulation
produces powerful light beams in lasers.

Gravity is the trickiest phenomenon to explain in the Looni-verse. In
the real world every object exerts a gravitational pull on every other object.
But in the Looniverse, levitation and delayed gravitational pull cannot
be explained by attractive forces alone. Instead, a radical theory must
be proposed: that matter causes gravitational pull but that energy causes
repulsion.

When repulsive forces caused by energy are equal to attractive forces
due to mass, the result is gravitational equilibrium, or levitation. When
Wile E. Coyote runs over a cliff he is in equilibrium; energy and matter
produce forces that cancel each other out and he does not fall. But when
he thinks about his predicament he uses up energy, the balance changes and
he plummets to the ground.

This theory is by no means complete and there are several holes. One
embarrassing prediction is that highly energetic toons should never touch
the ground because their great energy ensures that repulsive forces are
always greater than the gravitational pull. Observations clearly disagree
with this prediction and further work is needed here.

Clearly a true physics of the Looniverse is emerging but key questions
remain unanswered. Collaboration with toon scientists may provide some answers
but, unfortunately, conditions in the Looni-verse do not appear to foster
the necessary spirit of scientific enquiry. Sadly, the only question asked
of a toon scientist, until now, is ‘What’s up, Doc?’

Stephen Gould is a financial training consultant and an amateur physicist.