CONGRATULATIONS to the trade magazine Computer Telephony for an
illuminating article by Michael Doherty about the technology of communicating
with the dead.
The piece is full of fascinating information about what the author calls
鈥渘ecrophony鈥�. Did you know, for example, that Thomas Edison attempted to
construct a 鈥渟pirit communicator鈥� in the 1920s? He didn鈥檛 get very far but,
undaunted, continued the work after his death, communicating his progress
through a medium called Sigrum Seuterman in 1967.
Since Edison鈥檚 pioneering efforts, methods of communication with the 鈥渓iving
impaired鈥� have come on apace. Tape recorders, in particular, have proved to be
immensely useful in recording otherwise inaudible spirit voices. The late
Konstantine Raudive, a leader in this field, compiled a collection of 72 000
tapes of spirit recordings while he was still with us. After his death, like
Edison, he continued his work from 鈥渢he other side鈥� and was himself tape
recorded by his followers.
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Modified telephones have also played a part in necrophony. Several inventors
have come up with devices that enable people to phone deceased relatives and
friends. Notable among these is the 鈥渟piricom鈥�, which Doherty describes as 鈥渁
complex 29 megahertz communications system that established `quality鈥� two-way
conversations for the first time鈥�. Unfortunately, a slight hitch with the
spiricom emerged after the death of one of its inventors, William O鈥橬eil, who
related through the device that experiments on his side were being conducted at
68 MHz.
The next step is obvious, and people are already working on it. Before long,
we will be able to download software that will enable us to communicate with the
dead through our computers. If Doherty is to be believed, several companies in
the US are on the brink of releasing such software.
Feedback foresees problems here, though. How many dead people are computer
literate? And are computers on the other side IBM-compatible, or do the living
impaired prefer Apple Macs?
AT THE end of last year, Time magazine reported the preliminary
results of a poll it is conducting on its Internet site about whom it should
pick for its 鈥淧erson of the Century鈥�.
An impressive 5 million votes have been cast since the poll began in June. Of
these, 1.7 million votes were for Kemal Atat眉rk. Atat眉rk was the
founder of modern Turkey, which is, of course, no mean accomplishment. Despite
this, the Time folks suspect ballot rigging. We can鈥檛 imagine why.
ONCE AGAIN, we find our credulity a tiny bit stretched by a publisher鈥檚
claims for one of its books. Kogan Page鈥檚 The Making of a Manager鈥擧ow
to Launch Your Management Career on the Fast Track, by Donald A. Wellman,
is, we are told, 鈥減acked with handy tips鈥�. Among these, apparently, is
invaluable advice on 鈥渁cquiring a perfect memory in only thirty minutes鈥�.
Oh yeah?
SOMETIMES it is a good idea for the right hand to check what the left hand is
doing. The Open University recently sent an information pack to staff and
students. It included OU Student (鈥渢he official magazine of the Open
University Students Association鈥�), which had a glossy colour photograph of 鈥渢he
OU鈥檚 dynamic new Berrill Building, complete with heat-sensitive, automatic
飞颈苍诲辞飞蝉鈥�.
Meanwhile, the team that produces Sesame (鈥渞eaching the Open
University community worldwide鈥�) lamented that it is 鈥渁mong those coping with
the little eccentricities of the new landmark Berrill Building, like blinds that
fail to block the sun from computer screens, windows that don鈥檛 open,
uncontrollable heating and automatic doors that lock us in鈥�.
HERE IS another of those apparently positive statistics that, on closer
inspection, don鈥檛 look nearly so good after all. The winter issue of
Waterfront, Anglian Water鈥檚 customer relations magazine, proudly boasts:
鈥淚ndependent research shows that 65 per cent of Anglian Water customers are
happy with their tap water.鈥�
That means, of course, that out of every 100 customers, 35 are not happy with
their tap water. Hardly something to advertise widely, you would have
thought.
BEING a sewage worker is not the most popular of professions, particularly in
the summer when, apparently, you risk being bitten to shreds while doing
maintenance work.
The cause, according to a paper in the Journal of Applied Ecology,
is millions of tiny spiders blowing in the wind. Stone filter beds at sewage
works are ideal habitats for Leptorhoptrum robustum and Erigone
longipalpis, two arachnids which are only 4 millimetres long. Eric Duffey,
the paper鈥檚 author, found up to 67 000 of them per square metre at the Minworth
sewage works in Birmingham.
Unfortunately, when the sewage is turned off for maintenance, so is the
spiders鈥� supply of flies and other invertebrates. The spiders are then forced to
search for food elsewhere. Many of them get trapped inside workers鈥� clothing,
where their bites cause sores like those of mosquitoes.
Duffey says that the minute jaws of L. robustum are robust enough to
penetrate the skin.
How does he know? 鈥淭his was confirmed experimentally, using live spiders,鈥� he
says ominously.