WE HAVE only just become aware of a splendid website set up by Digital
Freedom Network back on 28 September 2000. It gives the results of a 鈥渇oil the
filter鈥� contest aimed at illustrating the unreliability of
censorware鈥攕oftware designed to filter out undesirable material on the
Internet.
The grand prize went to Joe J., who reported being prevented from accessing
his own high school鈥檚 website from his own high school鈥檚 library. It seems
Carroll High School had adopted filtering software which blocked 鈥渁ll
questionable material鈥�. This included the word 鈥渉igh鈥�.
The runner-up was a user named Hillary Anne, whose attempts to register the
e-mail address register hillaryanne@hotmail.com were rejected because censorware
spotted the hidden word 鈥渁ryan鈥�.
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The site goes on to list dozens more examples of censorware absurdity, but
our favourites have to be the joint winners of the 鈥減oetic justice award鈥�. To
quote in full:
鈥淎n anonymous submitter noticed that the website of Richard 鈥楧ick鈥� Armey,
Majority Leader of the US House of Representatives and a staunch defender of
censorware and strict Internet regulation, is himself a victim of censorware.
Net Nanny, SurfWatch, CYBERsitter, N2H2, and Wisechoice are among the 鈥榮oftware
solutions鈥� which Armey advocates. All of them filter his site because it
contains the word 鈥榙ick鈥�.
鈥淭he conservative group Focus on the Family intends its anti-porn site Pure
Intimacy to be a 鈥榬esource for those struggling with sexual temptations鈥� and the
鈥榩sychological bondage鈥� that is 鈥榓 major reason why individuals go online鈥�. Jim
K. observed that CYBERsitter blocked this site for violating the following
categories: porno, hardcoreporno, sexual, nudity, and, of course, bondage.鈥�
Go to dfn.org/focus/censor/contest.htm to see the rest of the winners.
THE Ananova news service carries, along with straight news, a 鈥減henomena鈥�
section of stories that need to be taken with a pinch of salt. A recent
selection was:
鈥� UFOs spotted over Kuala Lumpur.
鈥� Sorcerer 鈥渢o blame鈥� for village women鈥檚 swooning frenzy.
鈥� Witchcraft blamed for spontaneous combustion of Indian huts.
鈥� Hundreds see 鈥淛esus鈥� on Muslim鈥檚 house.
鈥� NASA finds evidence of black holes.
鈥� Eight Turks arrested for shooting at Moon.
Which of these stories, we ask ourselves, is the most improbable?
RUNNING through a pre-print database, we thought for a moment that
researchers had discovered a strange new therapy. One paper was entitled
鈥淣ose-Hoover dynamics for coherent states鈥�.
Eager to know more, we read on鈥攐nly to be told: 鈥淭he popular method of
Nose and Hoover to create canonically distributed positions and momenta in
classical molecular dynamics simulations is generalised to a genuine quantum
system of infinite dimensionality鈥︹��
Shame.
SOME people will try and sell you anything. Reader Hugh MacDiarmid was using
AltaVista to conduct a Web search on the word 鈥減rions鈥�. After a list of
websites, the following advice appeared: 鈥淗ave you tried these resources:
Comparison shop for prions. Let the merchants come to you! Shop by request for
prions at Respond.com.鈥�
Somehow, the idea of having the prion merchants come to him made MacDiarmid
feel uneasy, so he didn鈥檛 follow this particular link.
SCHOOL science books are getting awfully jokey these days, probably in a bid
to make young people see science as fun rather than fuddy-duddy. For example,
reader Lawrence McVeigh informs us that the cover of his son鈥檚 new copy of
Key Stage Three Mathematics Revision Guide bears the instruction 鈥淪hake
well before use鈥�. Meanwhile, John Richter of Rushmoor School, Bedford, tells us
that his physics workbook says on the back: 鈥淚f this book is accidentally
swallowed, drink plenty of milk.鈥�
Very droll.
UNTIL very recently, we learn, there was a number in the University of
Cambridge internal telephone directory entitled 鈥淧ayments to the Examiners鈥�. The
anonymous reader who has told us this says that he resisted the temptation to
phone and ask for the going rate for a 1st in physics. Just as well. The entry
has now been changed to 鈥淓xaminers Appointments and Payments鈥�.
ONE of the most interesting exhibits in London鈥檚 Science Museum is the Clock
of the Long Now, a beautiful clock that has been constructed to tick away with
absolute precision for the next 10,000 years.
The museum鈥檚 own sense of time, however, seems a little less exact. Go to its
website (sciencemuseum.org.uk) to find out about booking arrangements, and you
will be told: 鈥�24 hour hotline. To book tickets please use our advanced booking
service (lines open 9am to 6pm daily).鈥�
QUANTUM physics pops up everywhere. Reader Joe Morice bought some grape nuts
produced by Kraft. The packet informed him: 鈥淐ontents may have occurred during
shipping and handling.鈥�
Schr枚dinger鈥檚 cereal?