CONGRATULATIONS to reader Stu Ryder, who has inadvertently succeeded in
locking two computers into an endless loop.
Ryder needed to pick up e-mails sent to a former work colleague, so he
arranged for any e-mails sent to his ex-colleague鈥檚 computer to be automatically
forwarded to her. He also set up an auto-reply on the computer to tell senders
this was what had happened to their e-mails.
Enter his company鈥檚 IT department, which responds to any e-mail it receives
with an automatic acknowledgement. Also, like any other IT department, it
informs everyone on its network if there are any server problems causing delays
to the e-mail system.
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That is what it did a few days ago. There were problems with the server, so
the IT department sent out a warning message to everyone on the system. This
arrived at Ryder鈥檚 ex-colleague鈥檚 machine, which dutifully forwarded it to Ryder
and, as instructed, sent a message back to the IT department telling it this is
what had happened. The IT department responded with its usual
auto-acknowledgement. The ex-colleague鈥檚 computer forwarded this to Ryder and at
the same time sent its message back to the IT department telling it this is what
had happened. The IT department responded with its usual auto-acknowledgement.
The ex-colleague鈥檚 computer . . .
And so on and so on, forever and ever, until the end of virtual time.
HUSH! Don鈥檛 tell anyone!
We have just received an e-mail from a company called Hush Communications. It
asks if we 鈥渁re writing about security鈥� and says it is 鈥渄riven by the need for
privacy [and] committed to the development of the Internet as a safe and trusted
business channel鈥�. It goes on to offer one-to-one interviews with experts who
will answer the question 鈥淥nline privacy: what are the issues?鈥�
Well, we can immediately think of one issue to discuss with Hush. Instead of
using the standard blind-copy function, which means the recipients of a mass
mail-out are not told who the other recipients are, Hush has topped and tailed
its e-mail with a six-page list of literally hundreds of other recipients and
their private e-mail addresses.
Hush indeed. Or should we say 鈥淗uh!鈥�
THERE IS, of course, no truth at all in the idea that physicists are too
preoccupied with equations to be able to deal with personal relationships. So it
must have been for some other, quite different reason that Brookhaven National
Laboratory in the US put on a seminar entitled 鈥淲here Did Our Love
Go?鈥擯art II鈥� at the end of last month.
The seminar, presented by psychologist Barbara Fontana, was 鈥渄esigned to
describe techniques of `couples dialogue鈥�, developed to enhance relationships
between members of a couple鈥�. Perhaps it was all about entangled pairs of
photons.
THE IMPORTANT thing about product instructions is that they should be clear
and comprehensible. Here, as an example of how not to do it, are some highlights
from the owner鈥檚 manual for an LG refrigerator:
鈥淔ar Infrared Rays emitted from Far Infrared Rays Lamp restrains the dryness
of the foods and keeps its original form without transforming. Also Far Infrared
Rays keeps the taste and the smell of the foods for long by increasing the
nucleic acid.
鈥淚t is useful to storage the foods with no condiment such as salt or sugar,
and the foods needed to keep in the low temperature among the raw foods with no
heating or no disinfection.
鈥淚t is useful to keep the original taste of the food by F.I.R鈥檚 the
restraining excessive fermentation and overripe of the foods鈥擵egetable
with spices, yogurt and so on.
鈥淚t is useful to storage the foods unsuited in the Freezer among the foods
cooked or gone bad easily鈥擝oiled Egg, Bamboo Shoots, Vegetable for
condiment, and so.
鈥淒on鈥檛 install this appliance below 5 degrees C. It may cause the de basement
of the refridgerator.鈥�
ON SIMILAR lines, here鈥檚 a hearty message from a box of Fujinami drinking
straws: 鈥淟et鈥檚 try homeparty fashionably and have a joyful chat with nice
fellow. Fujinami鈥檚 straw will produce you young party happily and
别虫肠别别诲颈苍驳濒测.鈥�
PROMINENTLY displayed on bales of Erin moss peat鈥攖he sort you can buy
at garden centres鈥攊s the legend: 鈥淐ompressed to two and a half times
normal volume鈥�
WE OBSERVED on 24 March that Microsoft鈥檚 Windows 2000 starts up with the
message 鈥淏uilt on NT technology鈥�, and we went on to say that since this means
鈥淏uilt on new technology technology鈥� it joins 鈥淗IV virus鈥� and 鈥淧IN number鈥� as
examples of what we later christened RAS syndrome (recursive acronym syndrome
syndrome).
鈥淣o!鈥� cried several readers. 鈥淭he NT here means Northern Telecom.鈥� So we
corrected ourselves on 7 April.
But it turns out we were right the first time. As even more readers have told
us, NT as used by Microsoft really does mean 鈥渘ew technology鈥�. The confusion
arises because Northern Telecom has a trademark on the symbol NT, but Microsoft
came to an agreement with the company, allowing NT to be used in reference to
Windows NT (new technology) as well.
Got that?
BE SURE there鈥檚 a loo handy if you drink any Surgiva Natural Spring Water
from Trentino, Italy. The label states that the water 鈥渕ay have diuretic
properties鈥�. Is this unusual for water, we wonder?
FINALLY, reader Edwin Thomson tells us that he was watching the BBC TV
weather report when a special forecast for people hoping to go hiking over the
weekend appeared. It featured a map of the Scottish Highlands with symbols for
rain and shine on it, captioned with the words: 鈥淥utdoor Weather.鈥�