CRYSTAL homeopathy combines the principles of homeopathic medicine with the healing power of crystals. That鈥檚 the claim made in , a site offering very special crystals for sale. These crystals, while they were forming in caves over thousands of years, have picked up minute, homeopathic quantities of substances that will benefit you through their influence on your aura.
Does this sound like complete garbage to you? A Feedback reader who we shall call Gareth Thomas thought it did, so he posted a 鈥減rovocative enquiry鈥� at , a site where believers in all things mystical gather to discuss matters of common interest. Using the pseudonym 鈥渄isturber鈥�, he challenged believers in such therapies to convince him that they had any effect whatsoever other than providing vague emotional satisfaction. He singled out the claims made for crystal homeopathy as being 鈥渢ransparent balderdash鈥�.
The response from ukpagan devotees was immediate and irate. Some were so rude the forum鈥檚 moderators had to remove the posts. All insisted on the validity of their beliefs, some even referring to theoretical physics to support them. None questioned the claims of crystal homeopathy.
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Thomas persisted. He copied the full crystal homeopathy text from the Crystal Chamber site into ukpagan and criticised it sentence by sentence, declaring it a cynical, scientifically groundless scam. Still, no one agreed. Yet more people wrote heated posts defending crystal homeopathy and branding Thomas a cynic.
What none of them knew was that Thomas had created the Crystal Chamber site himself and that 鈥渃rystal homeopathy鈥� was his own invention. Depressed by the abundance of absurd claims for quack alternative therapies, he had set up the site as a credulity experiment.
He continued to have fun with it, posing for a while on ukpagan under a new pseudonym as the Crystal Chamber鈥檚 proprietor and enlisting enthusiastic support for his site. One 鈥渃rystal expert鈥� even offered to help him run the business.
But all good things have to end. If you now click on the top left corner of , you get a statement that begins: 鈥淣othing in this site makes any sense. It was all made up in a few hours to test susceptibility and gullibility.鈥� And Thomas has posted a final message on ukpagan explaining that the site and all his previous messages have been hoaxes.
Meanwhile, no wallets have been harmed by his experiment. He has torn up the cheques sent to him by people who wanted to buy his crystals and refunded credit card sales.
His one regret now that it鈥檚 all over is that he resisted the temptation to claim on his website that his crystals had been 鈥渕ined by elves鈥�.
MEANWHILE, among the (presumably genuine) claims made in an advertisement seen by reader Virginia Catmur for the Phoneshield Microcrystal Radiation Protector are these: 鈥淩adiation from mobile phones has for some time been suspected as the cause of 鈥� Fatigue 鈥� Poor concentration 鈥� Tiredness 鈥� Decision making 鈥� Headaches 鈥� Disturbed vision.鈥�
Enough said.
THE BUSH Administration is being criticised for its voluntary global warming programme, in which American industry is gently encouraged to 鈥渞educe the projected growth鈥� of greenhouse gases. Whatever the justification for the criticism, one aspect of the programme is unforgivable 鈥� its name.
Climate VISION stands for Climate, Voluntary Innovative Sector Initiatives: Opportunities Now. Not since 2001鈥檚 USA PATRIOT Act (Uniting and Strengthening of America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism) has an acronym been so contrived.
If this trend continues, we shudder to contemplate the inevitable GOD, MOTHERHOOD AND APPLE PIE Act.
ARKANSAS is set to become the second US state to ban the sale of urine for use in drug or alcohol tests. By a vote of 99 to 1, the Arkansas House of Representatives has passed a bill that would make selling urine an offence punishable by three months in jail and a $500 fine. It will become law if passed by the State Senate.
Still, local purveyors of pee will get off lightly compared with those in South Carolina, who face up to three years in jail if caught peddling piddle.
The widespread use of drug tests in the US (when applying for a job, for example) has led to a burgeoning Internet market in second-hand urine and the emergence of professional pee donors. Complete 鈥渢est kits鈥�, including heaters for warming stored urine to body temperature, can be bought for around $60, along with a variety of chemicals claimed to mask drug metabolites.
PEOPLE under 18 aren鈥檛 allowed to purchase alcohol in Britain. However, reader David Moore tells us that if they take their birth certificates down to Bembridge on the Isle of Wight, they might be in luck. A sign in the local supermarket reads: 鈥淒o not attempt to purchase alcohol or tobacco products if you are under 18 years old 鈥� unless you have proof of age.鈥�
From the instructions for the Botanico freestanding greenhouse heater: 鈥淒o not operate the heater when it is unattended.鈥� Try disobeying that 鈥�