WE STARTED to huff and puff with righteous indignation when we came across a site called . The site鈥檚 creator claims to have had official clearance to purchase 2录 tonnes of weapons-grade napalm, which he now offers for sale in individually packaged, 鈥渁ttractive, displayable canisters鈥�, each holding a litre of liquid.
Under 鈥淪afety Information鈥� the following tips are given: 鈥渄o not use it as fuel for your car鈥�, 鈥渄o not burn down trees and grass in your yard鈥�, and 鈥渄o not sniff the fumes鈥�. In fact, the only safe thing to do is 鈥渟tare at it鈥�.
But there鈥檚 a catch for anyone who feels there is a place in their home for such an ornament. If you go to 鈥淥rdering Information鈥�, you are confronted by a scornful 鈥淒id you actually think that we would sell YOU napalm?鈥�
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CONTRARY to popular belief, it seems that beauty lies in the nostril of the beholder. Beauty, that is, as defined by the weight-conscious. As the result of a decade-long study, Alan Hirsch of the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago reports that men who sniff 鈥渇loral-spicy鈥� scents on a woman perceive her to be on average more than 5 kilograms lighter. Only floral-spicy will do, mind you 鈥� the slimming effect vanishes as soon as cigarette smoke, pepperoni pizza aroma or even the smell of grapefruit wafts a man鈥檚 way.
There is a footnote to the study. According to Hirsch, women themselves aren鈥檛 fooled by this olfactory illusion. He failed to find a scent that swayed them in their weight estimations. 鈥淓ither women are too adroit at guessing other people鈥檚 weight,鈥� he concludes, 鈥渙r men are just easily influenced by how a woman smells.鈥�
THANKS to Annals of Improbable Research for drawing our attention to an interesting patent application. The online magazine鈥檚 鈥淩esearch that merits your attention鈥� section () tells us about US patent application 20020091564, which is described in the abstract as follows: 鈥淎 child adoption proceeding is conducted in the form of a television game and online media event, wherein couples compete against each other to win legal custody of the child.鈥�
And the inventor of this interesting idea? According to the patent application, he is none other than 鈥淯ri Geller鈥�, whose domicile is given as 鈥淏erkshire (GB)鈥�. No other details are given, apart from a US lawyer鈥檚 contact address.
Well, well, well.
ONE wonders if the writer of a piece extolling the excitement of tours of Antarctica on a cruise ship called the Peregrine Mariner has actually visited the place. Writing in Motor News, the magazine of the Royal Automobile Club of Tasmania, the anonymous author gushes: 鈥淓ach day you wake to the promise of new experiences: massive penguin rookeries, Antarctic research centres, old whaling stations, polar bears on an ice pack or spectacular panoramas of ice and water. Peregrine plans itineraries that are busy but also 鈥榯ake time to smell the roses鈥�. Everyone is there for the experience.鈥�
Presumably, the experience includes a mid-holiday flight up to the Arctic.
THE FOLKS paid to open George Bush鈥檚 letters may be a little mystified by the contents of his postbag at the moment. A French website, [sic], commemorates the day in 2002 when the American president appeared before the cameras sporting a bruised cheek he had sustained as he fainted after a pretzel went down the wrong way. The architects of the site promise that for every pretzel sent to Bush, 鈧�1 will be donated to a children鈥檚 charity.
The French may be wreaking vengeance for the French fries/freedom fries renaming debacle, but at least they鈥檙e doing it in a good cause.
A NEW species of fish has been 鈥渄iscovered鈥� by researchers from the French Institute of Development Research in the jungles of French Guiana. It is 50 centimetres long, weighs in at 5 kilograms and it is a kind of piranha.
But Tometes lebaili, as the species has been named, is a piranha with a difference 鈥� it鈥檚 a vegetarian, living exclusively on plants and fruit. And although previously unknown to Western science, it turns out that this gentle fish figures in a major way in the culture of the local Amerindians, who revere it and call it watau yaik毛. The institute鈥檚 journal Sciences au Sud comments that just about everyone seems to have known about the fish for years, except the scientists.
A vegetarian piranha? How sweet.
FINALLY, a recent press release from NASA announces: 鈥溞影稍磗 at the new institute, the Institute for Cell Mimetic Space Exploration (CMISE), will mimic living cells to help develop new technologies.鈥�
We wonder exactly how the scientists will mimic cells. Will they curl up in a ball and try to look like amoebas? Or will they stand straight with their arms spread out above them in an attempt to resemble nerve cells?
HAS the Divers Alert Network (DAN) been conducting seances? According to a recent issue of Rodale鈥檚 Scuba Diving magazine: 鈥淒ead and injured divers tell tales in the latest DAN report on dive accidents. Their stories could save your life鈥�