THE website of 鈥淭he Urology Team鈥� based in Austin, Texas, makes fascinating reading. Damian Gallagher and Will Jessop independently discovered it (don鈥檛 ask how) at , and direct us to the team profiles. These include the following memorable sentence: 鈥淒r. Richard (Dick) Chopp is well known in the Austin community for performing vasectomies.鈥�
There is also a surprising quote from another member of the team, Curtiss Hitt: 鈥淎fter 30 years, I still love seeing patients, especially the ones that I have had long-term relationships with.鈥�
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MEANWHILE, since we鈥檙e on the subject again, a colleague points to a rare case of a double nominative determinism in The Journal of Neuroscience on 22 June. Entitled 鈥淗ow fish hear and make sounds at same time鈥�, it is authored by Cornell University鈥檚 Andrew Bass. And Max Biden points to an article in our own pages back on 16 July (p 19). Headlined 鈥淒eep-sea fish lured by red-light district鈥�, it discusses work done at the Monterey Bay Aquarium Research Institute by Steven Haddock. These two authors should obviously get together some time.
And while we are at it, we are grateful to P. C. Newman for pointing out that there is a reporter with the Reuters news organisation called Elaine Lies.
But that鈥檚 quite enough!
WHAT can be the meaning of the headline 鈥淔inancial Services Authority appoints Naked鈥�, appearing on the website of the UK鈥檚 regulator of loans and鈥� stuff? Rob Milne wonders whether it may just be their way of finding out whether anyone actually reads these things. If so, full marks: after all, it worked for us.
鈥淛ohn Marsh鈥檚 bottle of Clairol Herbal Essences shampoo bears the words 鈥淣EW same great scent鈥濃��
Naked, however, turns out on reading to be a consultancy appointed to provide 鈥渟trategic media planning advice鈥� 鈥� a term which, with legal considerations in mind, we shall not be translating. Feedback wondered whether they got the job purely in the hope that the announcement would spice up the image of the FSA, who are basically meta-accountants and therefore could mistakenly be seen as being as staid as a very staid thing. But then we realised that somewhere in the Treasury a public official is responsible for overseeing the FSA and its deals with consultants, who may now have the title 鈥淭he Naked civil servant鈥�.
JOB-HUNTING? Try Stanford University鈥檚 Office of Development, which according to Diane Richards has an excellent opportunity available for 鈥渁 proven leader to oversee the direct mail, telephone, email and online solicitation of Stanford鈥檚 164,000 living degree-holders鈥�. We presume that the qualifications required to beg donations from deceased alumni are rather different.
A FILING mistake meant that we have only just rediscovered an email that Matthew Driver sent us in June. It was to alert us to the World Glaucoma Congress, organised by the Association of International Glaucoma Societies, and in particular to a song composed for the occasion by one Erik Greve. This, Driver told us, can be heard on the association鈥檚 website in a performance by soprano Melanie Greve, to the visual accompaniment of glaucoma society heads bobbing up and down in time to the music.
鈥淚 really do want to share the joy of this with as many people as possible,鈥� Driver told us. 鈥淪o even if you just publish the URL I will be very happy.鈥�
The congress is long over, but we are pleased to oblige by reporting that The Glaucoma Hymn can still be heard when you go to . We thoroughly recommend it.
A FEW weeks ago Vivienne Tuffnell wrote to tell us that in Preston Park, Middlesbrough, there used to be a sign directing visitors to the 鈥淏ird Aviary鈥�. She remembered a trip there with a friend, who pointed out the sign in some resigned disgust, remarking that it must be to distinguish it from the Hippo Aviary on the other side of the park.
A nice story, we thought. But before we had a chance to print it we received another email from Tuffnell telling us that the park in question was Stewart Park, not Preston Park. 鈥淧lease correct the name,鈥� she asked. 鈥淚 was having a blonde moment 鈥� I鈥檓 far too young for senior ones.鈥�
UFO Crash Retrieval Conference
FINALLY, you still have time to catch the third annual UFO Crash Retrieval Conference, 4 to 6 November in Las Vegas (). It鈥檚 not quite as close to the legendary Area 51 as you can get without security clearance, but it promises strange things aplenty. Speakers will describe bodies and hardware retrieved from crashes and try to explain how the aliens鈥� spaceships were supposed to fly before they crashed. Expect, too, denunciations of vast official conspiracies devoted to keeping alien knowledge hidden. Unless, of course, Men in Black with scissors have snipped this item out of your copy.