THANKS to Mark MacDiarmid for alerting us to the existence of a very silly book. Who Built The Moon? is by Christopher Knight and Alan Butler. The blurb reveals that: 鈥淭he Moon has confounded scientists for many years. It does not obey the known rules of astrophysics and there is no coherent theory of its origin 鈥� in fact, it should not be there鈥any specialists suspect that the Moon is hollow, which should not be possible鈥hen all of the facts are dispassionately reviewed it becomes unreasonable to cling to the idea that the Moon is a natural object.鈥�
Yes, and what鈥檚 more there are fairies at the bottom of Feedback鈥檚 garden.
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WE thought we had well and truly finished with the theme of streets and other municipal features with no name, but Dmitry Knyazev directs us to a 鈥渢own鈥� in Arizona called Nothing, and we simply can鈥檛 resist.
Apparently, Nothing has a population of four. They run a gas station and convenience store, and are variously described as kind-hearted and honest or as taking advantage of the town鈥檚 isolation to overcharge customers in dire need of fuel. There are also entertaining reports (at ) of proposals to add a 鈥渓ounge鈥� to the town鈥檚 few buildings that will be camouflaged to make it invisible in the desert.
鈥溾�滻f you are contemplating suicide, please email us. We want to pray for and encourage you.鈥� Such is the unusual attitude of the good people at 鈥�
A prominent sign in this curious little place states: 鈥淭he staunch citizens of Nothing are full of hope and faith and believe in [the] work ethic. Through the year these dedicated people had faith in Nothing, hope for Nothing and worked for nothing for Nothing.鈥�
SEVERAL astute readers in the UK pounced on a sentence that appeared in The Guardian newspaper on 17 April. A new roller coaster called Stealth has been installed at Thorpe Park, a theme park just outside London, and it pulled in such a large crowd on Easter Sunday that the park had to be closed on safety grounds. The Guardian鈥榮 report of the incident explained that Stealth is thought to be the 鈥渇astest and tallest launch coaster in Europe. The ride launches riders over a drop of 205 feet, reaching speeds of up to 80 mph in 2.3 seconds. The drop 鈥� the fourth steepest in the world 鈥� is vertical.鈥�
What our readers want to know is: how do the other three manage to be even steeper?
THIS was the wording on a mortgage quote Christian Dawson received from Barclays bank: 鈥淣o early repayment charges are applied to this mortgage. However, a final repayment charge which is currently 拢275.00 is payable if you repay your mortgage in full before the end of the mortgage term.鈥�
In other words, there is an early repayment charge of 拢275.00.
WHEN Neil Munro was browsing the online library catalogue of the Royal Botanic Garden Edinburgh for its listings on Arabia, he was interested to see that one book, Flora of the Arabian Peninsula and Socotra by A. G. Miller and colleagues, was listed as: 鈥淣o copies currently available. (Estimated wait is 9802 days.)鈥�
Surprised that this title was in such hot demand, Munro wondered whether he shouldn鈥檛 put in a request for it in case he was still interested in February 2033.
WE HAVE said it before and we will say it again: punctuation matters. What, for example, was Ian Moseley to make of the header of an email he received from the UK Food Standards Agency: 鈥淗armonisation of SRM [specific risk materials] Controls 鈥� Removal of Bovine Vertebral Column from Derek Shilson, Food Standards Agency on 22 Mar 2006 at 13:42.鈥�
Whatever it does mean, Moseley hopes Shilson is feeling better now.
OUR comment about the entry fee for aliens at London鈥檚 Science Museum (8 April) prompted Chris Brooks to tell us that it is not the only London museum with a problem involving weird creatures. He was at the Natural History Museum last week, where he saw a notice at the main entrance saying 鈥淕iant squid not taking visitors鈥�.
FINALLY, here is another joke about what the media persist in calling 鈥渁vian bird flu鈥� 鈥� presumably (as reader Jeff Dickens points out) to distinguish it from, for example, mammalian bird flu.
A bear, a lion and a chicken are talking about who is the hardest. The bear says, 鈥淲hen I roar the whole forest trembles.鈥� The lion says, 鈥淲hen I roar the whole jungle shakes with fear.鈥� The chicken says, 鈥淎ll I have to do is cough and the whole world runs for the hills.鈥�