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Armpit art

SEVERAL readers have written to us adding their own examples of what Colum Clarke called 鈥渁pposite adjacents鈥 at the top of the pages of dictionaries (7 October). Among our favourites are two that Jonathan Ormond found in his Reader鈥檚 Digest Reverse Dictionary (1989 edition). 鈥淎rmpit Art鈥, he suggests, sounds like a plausible future winner of the Turner Prize or some other award for contemporary art, while his favourite pairing is 鈥渟omething I would never want to hear in any religious service鈥: a 鈥淜azoo Kyrie Eleison鈥.

Other readers have expanded the field to include encyclopedias. Glyn Williams remembers the spine of volume IV of an encyclopedia he once saw 鈥 he thinks it might have been Arthur Mee鈥檚 Children鈥檚 Encyclopedia 鈥 which announced that it was 鈥淔un to Hug鈥. And John Shortridge recalls a volume of the first edition of The Australian Encyclopedia that was labelled 鈥淢arsupials to Parliament鈥, which seems to us a worthy aim.

Baiting the 419 scam

AN EMAIL we recently received begins: 鈥淗aving consulted with my colleagues and based on the information gathered from the Nigerian Chambers Of Commerce And Industry, I have the privilege to offer you this great new book, Scamorama. I request your assistance to make this book known to the public. If you can do this, I will transfer the sum of $47,500,000.00 (forty-seven million, five hundred thousand United States dollars) into your accounts鈥︹

It is, of course, a joke 鈥 but the book really exists. It is produced by Eve Edelson, the owner of the website , and the email is in fact a press release. It continues: 鈥淓veryone has no doubt received these so-called 鈥419鈥 emails in their inbox. Most of us immediately delete or trash them. However, groups of people around the world have taken it a step further and turned the tables on the scammers, leading them on with their own nonsense, strictly to waste the scammers鈥 time 鈥 a practice known as scambaiting.鈥

Scamorama, the press release tells us, provides 鈥渟erious information鈥 about the 419 scam as well as documenting the 鈥渨eird form of cultural exchange鈥 between the fraudsters and the people who bait them. To find out more go to Edelson鈥檚 website or email books

Harold be thy name

THE exploration of the language error known as an 鈥渆ggcorn鈥 鈥 in which a word is confused with another one that sounds similar but still makes sense at some level (26 August, p 52) 鈥 reminded Trevor Magnusson of a colleague a few years back. An earnest Christian, he had obviously been exposed to various bromides such as 鈥淚n times of trial, we must rest on the pillars of our faith鈥 and 鈥淓ven Christ himself when facing crucifixion could not see beyond the portals of the tomb鈥.

When he related these gems to others, Magnusson tells us, what came out were two entirely logical eggcorns: 鈥淚n times of trial, we must rest on the pillows of our faith鈥 and 鈥淓ven Christ himself when facing crucifixion could not see beyond the portholes of the tomb鈥.

鈥淔rom the press office of The Lancet: 鈥淧rime Minister of Norway to give lecture on child survival in London next week.鈥 We hadn鈥檛 realised child mortality in London was particularly high. Or that Norway cared鈥

This in turn reminded Feedback of a relative in her fifties who, like a recent letter-writer to The Guardian newspaper in London, remembers in all innocence mistaking the words 鈥淥ur father, which art in heaven, hallowed be thy name,鈥 that begin the classic version of the Lord鈥檚 Prayer, as 鈥淥ur father, a chart in heaven, Harold be thy name.鈥

The same weight as鈥r鈥

THERE鈥橲 something about unusual units of measurements that brings out the fussy precision in people. Take the piece we ran on 29 April exposing the amount of dog faeces deposited in the New Forest in the UK each year 鈥 鈥渢he same weight as 240 double-decker buses鈥. This comparison does at least give a fairly good impression of the quantities involved, but unfortunately the same cannot be said about the quote in The Hastings Observer that Jackie Field has forwarded to us. It comes from the manager of a crane that caused alarm among council safety officials when it was placed on the seaside resort鈥檚 pier overnight in preparation for repair work the following day: 鈥溾楾he crane weighs almost 4 tonnes,鈥 he said. 鈥楾he same weight as lots of people.'鈥

Fist for emergencies

FINALLY, the emergency instructions for passengers on First Great Western trains, which serve the south and west of England, seem unusually solicitous. Ian Haggo spotted this in one of their carriages: 鈥淪trike cover of emergency release with fist (located above external door)鈥. Haggo is impressed that a fist is provided in case you forget to bring your own with you.

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