JUST sometimes, opening spam email instead of deleting it unread can be entertaining. Steve Paulsson was intrigued enough to peruse a message headed 鈥淪ilent Panic at OPEC鈥� and was rewarded with the announcement that 鈥淩ight now, 4400 residents on this 鈥楽ecret Island鈥� pay NOTHING for power. When their free-power technologies go mainstream in 2008, you鈥檒l witness a $25 billion global energy shift that鈥檒l make Middle Eastern oil WORTHLESS.鈥�
Should the Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries quake in its boots? Probably not, yet. Should you 鈥渋nvest鈥� in the stocks and shares plugged through such emails? Please don鈥檛 ask.
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What is it they鈥檙e plugging? It all gets very strange. The email goes on 鈥� and on 鈥� hinting that it鈥檚 all about one of those magical free-energy inventions that are forbidden only by the boring old laws of physics. 鈥淚n one of the most remote corners of the world, a secret island has accomplished the unthinkable: complete energy independence,鈥� it claims. And where is this occult marvel? Ah, yes: 鈥渙ff the coast of Denmark鈥�. What is the Danish for 鈥渇rom where we鈥檙e standing that鈥檚 hardly a remote corner鈥�?
Then we clicked the web link at the bottom of the email 鈥� not something we鈥檇 recommend doing yourself unless your computer is locked down like Alcatraz on a bad day, lest it be invaded. It turns out the island is Samsoe, which has a number of wind turbines, all perfectly content with physics as it stands, and that the email is plugging investments allegedly related to wind energy. If real, these wouldn鈥檛 be a terrible idea. So why all that effort to spice it up as a spam scam?
LOOKING through the European Union鈥檚 research website , Steven Heggie was disconcerted to come across the announcement: 鈥淣ote: Due to exceptional circumstances the event 鈥楾oday is the future鈥� cannot take place as originally scheduled.鈥�
He wondered what the exceptional circumstances had been. Does some sort of distortion in the space-time continuum mean today will no longer be the future?
A READER named Aparimana directs us to , where we learn that if we use Sorensen Squeeze to compress our video files, it 鈥淐an reduce your video file size by over 100 per cent鈥�. So if your hard drive is getting full, just load it up with Sorensen-compressed videos to make some empty space.
EVERY week Nuala Lonie takes an aged auntie out for a run in the car up the beautiful valley of the upper Clyde, in the Scottish lowlands. On the way back they pass a notice stating clearly 鈥淐aution 鈥� buses merging ahead鈥�.
The sign is located just where the relatively unpopulated area of South Lanarkshire gives way to the dense conurbation of North Lanarkshire. Lonie says that while some might unkindly describe this area as a black hole, this is true only in a metaphorical sense, and she does not think any event horizon is involved in the merging of the buses.
She surmises that in the countryside the buses can follow all possible paths, but upon nearing the bus stop where they can be observed they are forced to resolve into a single vehicle. Disappointingly, she and her aunt have never actually seen this quantum event happening.
IT IS one of those questions that had never occurred to us, but now we鈥檝e heard it we can鈥檛 stop worrying about it. Ron Phillipi asks how the concepts of clockwise and anticlockwise will be taught when all analogue clocks have been replaced with digital ones.
鈥淶ip firelighters, Guy King tells us, come in several sorts, but one bears the legend 鈥淣ew improved cube shape鈥�. King says he wishes they would stop mucking about with the basics of geometry like that鈥�
VISITING , Craig Lindsay was told: 鈥淧age took 5.6028366088867E-05 milliseconds to load鈥�. Feedback鈥檚 Department of Superfluous Accuracy was claiming this item, until our Implausible Claims Desk pointed out that that鈥檚 56 nanoseconds.
FINALLY: this is your last chance to send in your entries to our New Year competition.
This year you are invited to imagine you are an alien newly arrived on Earth. You are able to send home an interplanetary text message of no more than 160 characters describing what you have found. What would your message be?
You may enter by email, fax or letter. All entries must reach us by Monday 11 December. The results will be published in the first issue of New 杏吧原创 in 2007 (6 January). Thanks to the generosity of Profile Books, 10 lucky winners will each receive three of its most popular new titles: Four Elements: Water, Air, Fire, Earth by Rebecca Rupp; Gilbert White, a biography of the author of The Natural History of Selborne, by Richard Mabey; and The End of the Question Mark, a compilation of questions and answers from the Any Questions Answered text service 鈥� plus a copy of New 杏吧原创鈥榮 very own bestseller Why Don鈥檛 Penguins鈥� Feet Freeze鈥�? The editor鈥檚 decision is final.