HOW much 鈥渋maginative鈥� science can be crammed into two sentences? Jane Griffith-Ward directs us to a promising candidate: 鈥淭immy [the Energy Bear] has been developed to re-energise the 鈥榙ead鈥� atmosphere in centrally heated indoor rooms 鈥� effectively bringing the natural elements from fresh air 鈥� inside! Combining gentle magnetic fields in his tummy, with natural daylight energy in the form of photon platinum fabric, Timmy helps to neutralise electrical smog鈥︹��
So, according to the advert for Timmy at (pdf format), he can mess with the chemistry and electromagnetic fields of your child鈥檚 bedroom 鈥� using only natural means, of course. We presume that the 鈥減hoton platinum fabric鈥� sported by Timmy 鈥� who, by the way, was 鈥渂orn in the stars and rode to England on a moonbeam鈥� 鈥� is hand-spun from real, natural sunbeams, though the price of 茂驴陆29.99 makes us wonder how much real, natural platinum is involved.
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Neither are we sure about the claim of 鈥渆ncouraging restful sleep鈥�, given the announcement that Timmy is 鈥渁 delightful cuddly, soft toy who is literally 鈥榓live'鈥�. Have they never seen the horror movies about that kind of thing?
SHOULD we give Microsoft鈥檚 Windows Vista operating system a try? Or should we not? That is the question we鈥檝e been mulling over since its launch earlier this year.
鈥淎t Manchester Piccadilly station in the UK, Don Wycherley spotted a large, very solid door bearing the easy-to-obey instruction: 鈥淒o not enter when closed鈥濃��
Vista has special requirements, so software companies have been forced to develop special 鈥淰ista-ready鈥� versions of their programs. AOL has released a free Vista-ready version of its email and internet software, so we gave it a go.
In the UK, AOL had previously hired the actress Joanna Lumley 鈥� best known for her roles in the cult TV series The New Avengers and Absolutely Fabulous 鈥� to say 鈥淗ello鈥�, 鈥淵ou鈥檝e got Mail鈥� and 鈥淕oodbye鈥� in her inimitable posh-but-sultry English intonation. The new Vista-ready version has replaced Ms Lumley with someone who sounds like he鈥檚 advertising used cars on a radio station in Hicksville, USA.
Searching for a setting that would silence this horrid intrusion, we were rewarded with a big yellow exclamation mark and the bewildering instruction: 鈥淔orm GID: 44-33806 is Missing! Please File a Bug! OK.鈥�
No, it鈥檚 not OK, but thanks anyway, AOL. You鈥檝e given us a very clear sign that we are not yet ready for Vista.
WHEN Victoria Petherick-Brian emailed us to say that she had until recently kept a label from a bottle of Perrier carbonated natural spring water that listed the ingredients as 鈥淪odium鈥�2.3mg/200ml, Potassium鈥�0.3mg/200ml. Sodium free鈥�, we thought we ought to check that the label really says this. None of the Perrier bottles we found had these words on them, so we emailed Petherick-Brian, asking if she was quite sure. Here is her reply:
鈥淚鈥檝e just been to the supermarket myself to check on this. The current Perrier labels are a new design and no longer say this. Nonetheless, I am absolutely certain they used to until recently as I still have the section of label which I personally peeled off a Perrier bottle, and which clearly shows this information. And thanks to Google, I have found a Peter J. Farrel who noticed the same thing but, unlike me, had the foresight to save and scan a whole label.鈥�
You can see not only the scan of the controversial label, but also a very extensive discussion of its meaning, significance and legal status at .
Never let it be said that Feedback does not deal with the significant issues of the day.
WHERE do you look for inspiration if you want to invent a trade name? The Newport Corporation鈥檚 recent introduction of its 鈥渟tate-of-the-art high power picosecond Pantera(TM) laser鈥� piqued our attention. No doubt it鈥檚 a pretty cool laser, and in Spanish the name means 鈥減anther鈥� 鈥� but Pantera is better known to many as an extremely angry heavy-metal band that spent two decades beating on their audiences鈥� ear drums. Is there a heavy metal fan trapped in the Newport Corporation marketing department?
ENJOYMENT of a programme on cable TV was interrupted for James Howlett by a large message box covering most of the screen. It announced: 鈥淵ou are receiving an update to your service. The Remote Control will not work for a few moments. To clear this message please press OK on the remote.鈥�
FINALLY, when Dawn Gordon was researching the retention rate of students in universities, she stumbled on an article entitled 鈥淚mplementing a complete control curriculum in the classroom鈥�. This could be the gem that the world鈥檚 teachers have been waiting for, she thought. It turned out, sadly for some, to be about teaching 鈥渃omplete control鈥� in engineering.