IN A piece about 鈥淓nergized 5D Sound CDs鈥� not so long ago, we suggested that, along with 鈥渧ibrational energies鈥�, combinations of the words 鈥渟ubtle鈥�, 鈥渆nergy鈥�, 鈥渜uantum鈥� and 鈥減hysics鈥� were sure-fire indicators that texts mentioning them were fruitloopery deluxe (10 June, 2006). We feel it鈥檚 time to add 鈥淒NA鈥� to the list.
Take , which announces that 鈥淭heta DNA healing can be described as the practical application of applied quantum physics鈥� and then hastily adds that it 鈥渄oes not require an understanding of theory or scientific disciplines鈥�.
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Well, that鈥檚 a relief, but what exactly is Theta DNA healing? One thing is certain: it has absolutely nothing to do with either DNA or quantum physics. Instead, we are told that Theta DNA healing is about 鈥済oing beyond time and space, reaching the Source, the place of limitless possibilities, witnessing and co-creating reality, being the observer鈥�. There is much more of this ilk, but nothing that tells us in any concrete terms what Theta DNA healing actually involves scientifically. We are assured, however, that the technique 鈥渉eals and transforms in moments鈥�. Of course. Why not?
Phil Pattenden, who alerted us to this feast of psychobabble, also directs us to , which has all sorts of exciting things to say in the section 鈥淎bout Atlantis鈥�. This plunges straight in with the question: 鈥淲ho originally settled in Golden Atlantis?鈥� The answer, apparently, is: 鈥淚n approximately 20,000 BC a clarion call resounded throughout the Universes [sic] for volunteers to take part in the final experiment of Atlantis. Millions responded but only 64,000 were chosen at first.
鈥淣ews from Israel, thanks to Jacrom Page: the British consul general in Jerusalem is Richard Makepeace. 鈥淥ne can but hope,鈥� Page notes鈥�
鈥淔or the glorious period of fifteen hundred years the people vibrated at the fifth dimensional frequency, their energy so pure that their chakras literally glowed with joy and vitality.鈥�
Hello, it鈥檚 that 鈥渇ifth dimension鈥� again, taking us back to where we came in with those CDs. Something else to add to our list of fruitloopery indicators.
THE floods that swirled across the UK at the end of July left Tewkesbury, Gloucestershire, cut off and half-submerged, and the county town of Gloucester threatened by a surge coming down the river Severn. Tom Saul, who lives nearby, was anxious to check the weather forecast for the area. He went to the BBC website and found he needed to reset the 鈥淲here I live鈥� preferences. Having hit the 鈥渃hange location鈥� button, he typed in 鈥淕loucester鈥�, only to be informed: 鈥淪orry we have found no results for 鈥楪loucester鈥�. Please try again with another postcode or town name.鈥�
Saul was horrifed. Had the dear old town already been submerged to the extent that the BBC could no longer locate it?
SPELLCHECKERS may be partly to blame for this synopsis of the book Crystal Fire: Birth of the information age: 鈥淥n December 16, 1947, John Bardeen and Walter Brattain, physicists at Bell Laboratories, jabbed two electrodes into a sliver of the metalloid geranium. The power flowing from the geranium far exceeded what went in; in that moment the transistor was invented and the Information Age was born.鈥�
Derrick Thatcher, who spotted this, notes: 鈥淚t was my understanding that flower power wasn鈥檛 invented until the 1960s.鈥� Feedback is merely disappointed that no one seems to have taken advantage of the free source of energy that Bardeen and Brattain apparently discovered.
AN ARTICLE on about a new program says: 鈥淎ccording to Associated Press, the new program has a dragon drop interface.鈥� Presumably the sentence had been transcribed from a phone call, surmises Don Jewitt, who concludes that the program in question actually has a rather less exotic drag-and-drop interface.
We are reminded of a personal ad in a newspaper in Sheffield in the north of England that we reported on (8 May 1999). It said: 鈥淧rofessional man, 45, head on a stick, seeks similar woman鈥�. Puzzlement ensued, until the penny dropped that this too had been taken down from a phone call. We can only hope that hedonistic professional women in the Sheffield area got the message.
SOLAR-powered lights sound like a good idea. They charge up their batteries during the day and automatically switch on to make use of the stored energy when night falls. So Justin Story was perplexed by the instructions on the ones he bought: 鈥淧lease do not use until the batteries have been fully charged鈥� To fully charge the batteries leave in continuous sunlight for 24 hours.鈥�
He considered paying to launch them into space for a day 鈥� or taking them to the North or South Pole, depending on the season.
FINALLY, from the department of the blindingly obvious, comes this headline on a sent out by 鈥淢izzou鈥�, as the University of Missouri-Columbia likes to be known: 鈥淢izzou study shows that possessing a fake ID results in more drinking by underage college students.鈥�