Video: See Colin Pillinger announce the winner
Moon rock competition â the results
EVERYONE knows the words spoken by Neil Armstrong when he became the first person to step onto the moon: âThatâs one small step for [a] man, one giant leap for mankind.â Our competition to celebrate the 40th anniversary of the moon landing asked you to imagine something Armstrong might have said instead. A piece of the moon is the prize for the winning entry, which we announce below.
With 5500 entries, this has been New ĐÓ°ÉÔ´´âs most popular competition ever â and what a wealth of wit and imagination it has unleashed!
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Many readers went for the high ground, aiming to capture the grandeur of that moment in July 1969. âToday the moon, tomorrow the stars!â some had Armstrong proclaim. This, they asserted, was the first step to Mars, to the cosmos, to infinityâŚ
Others took a less triumphalist view. âGreat. We got to the moon. Now letâs go back and sort out the Earth,â said their more cynical Armstrong. One telling phrase that several readers offered was: âOne small step for man, one giant carbon footprint for mankind.â More positively, some readers had Armstrong use the moment as an opportunity to call for world peace.
For hundreds of others, the most pressing concern of Apollo 11âs mission was to find out if the moon is made of cheese. Around half of this group had Armstrong expressing astonishment that it really is, while the other half had him equally surprised to find that it isnât. Those in the former camp often went on to ask Houston to send a consignment of crackers to the moon as soon as possible, while those in the latter lamented that the landerâs supply of crackers wouldnât be needed â and nor would the fondue set.
Readers with a sense of history alluded to the space race between the US and the Soviet Union. Many, like our winner, had Armstrong arriving on the moon to find evidence that the Russians had got there first. We also enjoyed the sense of period in Stuart Greenwoodâs entry: âFor those of you at home watching in black and white, youâre not missing much.â Sadly, this broke our rule of a maximum of 75 characters (including spaces) per entry.
Other popular themes were words to the effect of: âIâll never trust my satnav againâ, âWho put that camera there?â, âWhereâs the welcoming party?â, âI think I left the gas onâ, âThis place has a great view but no atmosphereâ, âI can see my house from hereâ, âYahoooooooooooooo!!!â and, most frequent of all, âIâm over the moonâ.
Finally, researchers studying the psychology of science magazine readers will surely be interested in the large number of entries that had Armstrong stepping off the ladder onto some dog dirt. Several linked this to the space race theme by suggesting that the offending faeces had been left by Laika, the dog the Russians launched into space to orbit the Earth in 1957. For others, it could have been any old dog and was just another example of the moonâs general inhospitable untidiness.
There were so many entertaining entries on all these themes that weâve included 12 runners-up below.
Richard Hambly from Potts Point, New South Wales, Australia, wins a piece of the moon for his entry:
⢠Hi Yuri, can we just keep this between the two of us?
⢠A journey of a thousand light years begins with a single step
Ofir Deutscher
⢠[Annoying ring tone]
HELLO⌠Iâm on the moon⌠no, its rubbish
David Mountford
⢠Hey, the black monolith looks bigger up close
Ian Burgess
⢠I feel so small⌠I need a hug
Robert
⢠Iâm wearing my wifeâs knickers
Tom
⢠In forty years theyâll be giving this stuff away in magazines
Adrian Bowyer
⢠Just pretend I said something witty and incisive and letâs get out of here
Fionn Pooler
⢠One small step for a man because women werenât allowed on this mission
Jackie Morgan
⢠One small step for man â one giant leap for conspiracy theorists
Jeremy Drew
⢠⌠Prompt?
David Malarkey
⢠Thatâs⌠[crunch]⌠oops! Sorry for squashing you, little fella
Richard Tucker
⢠Thatâs one small step, a giant leap, a kick and clap, and turn on five
Duncan McKenzie
