杏吧原创

Feedback: Plight of the imprisoned executives

Business-class jail cells, a scientific prediction you can bank on, anxious bedbugs, and more

Plight of the imprisoned executives

CAREER transitions can be difficult, especially when they are involuntary. After reading about recent well-deserved status changes for some former high-level executives, Feedback can see the need for Executive Prison Consultants (EPC).

鈥淎n error message flashed up on Abbi Connor鈥檚 Lenovo laptop saying: 鈥淭he Network Connect session will time out due to inactivity in 71581872 minutes.鈥濃

Consider the plight of the high-flying executive caught in an act of fiscal chicanery and facing the prospect of serving time in a US federal prison, or perhaps already sitting in jail. 鈥淓ither way, you have embarked on a personal journey that can be confusing, frightening and intimidating,鈥 says comfortingly. It urges visitors to 鈥渢rust our experience鈥 with the prison system and consult the company鈥檚 expertise for help in coping while inside, as well as for help in getting back outside as quickly as possible.

Unlike most ex-cons, company president Robert Zaranek is totally open about his incarceration. He writes that he was sentenced to 31 months in jail after pleading guilty to 鈥渁n allegation of financial impropriety鈥 while working as 鈥渁 well-respected public administrator鈥.

Consultation with a famous search engine confirms that he is not exaggerating his . Zaranek pleaded guilty in October 2005 to embezzling some $400,000 from the Michigan school district where he had been an .

The EPC website also includes a testimonial from , a former National Basketball Association referee whose life merits his own lengthy Wikipedia page. Donaghy credits Executive Prison Consultants with getting him out of prison months before his original release date. Alas, Wikipedia reports, the former referee then violated his parole and got sent back to the clink to do the rest of his time.

Ice 11 鈥 the next frutloop ingredient?

鈥淥H NO!鈥 That was Don Jewett鈥檚 response to New 杏吧原创鈥榮 report of a type of ice crystal known as ice XI out there in the solar system (27 August, p 8). Why? Because of our observation that 鈥渢iny flecks of the stuff embedded in ordinary ice can help convert all of it鈥 to ice XI.

鈥淲hat,鈥 Don asks plaintively, 鈥渋f the homeopaths get hold of this?鈥

It does indeed sound a bit like the 鈥渨ater with a memory鈥 of which they are so fond. Will they notice that some actual atoms need to be present and organised in the ice XI structure, thus ruling out any connection to their favourite solutions containing no atoms of the alleged active substance at all?

Don thinks they will miss this subtle point, and nominates the appearance of 鈥渋ce XI鈥 in any description of a commercially available product as a 鈥済ood marker of fruitloopery鈥. We鈥檝e waited, and found none.

We pondered raising 鈧900 to apply for a as a stick with which to beat anyone who indulged in such misappliance of science.

But then we calculated that this new field of pre-emptive anti-fruitloopery is so wide 鈥 much wider even than that of actual fruitloop claims 鈥 that the time would be better spent, well, writing stories about ice XI for Feedback鈥

Comet crash forecast

WINNER of the Feedback 鈥渟tating the obvious鈥 award this week is Perry Vlahos, spokesman for the Astronomical Society of Victoria in Australia.

Eric Salter tells us that in a Sydney Morning Herald piece in September about NASA鈥檚 doomed UARS satellite, which was travelling over Melbourne on its way to crashing to Earth, Vlahos had the opportunity to pass on some of his astronomical expertise to the newspaper鈥檚 readers.

鈥淚t鈥檚 a little difficult to ascertain where it will come down,鈥 he said, 鈥渂ecause there are so many variables involved but it will definitely come down in some part of the world.鈥

Incomprehensible product claim

TWO questions for our readers: one, do you understand the following quote? Two, do you believe it?

The quote is from the website of , which reader Carla Cripps hesitantly alerts us to.

鈥淧remier Research Labs is known internationally as the pre-eminent manufacturer of excipient-free, premier quality nutraceutical formulations, super food concentrates and the world鈥檚 first producer of quantum cellular resonance products that are capable of restoring quantum coherence to the body鈥檚 inherent biofield.鈥

Poor little bed bugs

FINALLY, in response to the article 鈥淓asing bedbug anxiety鈥 in the Healthbeat newsletter from Harvard Medical School in Boston, Mark Pearson makes the following comment: 鈥淎s a good liberal, I do believe that we should be concerned for all creatures, even ones as apparently unlovable as Cimex lectularius鈥 but I am struggling to get as concerned about their mental state as much as Harvard Medical School believes I should.鈥

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