READERS continue to send examples of signs that they feel instruct them to exhibit quantum behaviour. Dermot Bradley, in a caf茅 in Edinburgh, UK, was instructed to 鈥渜ueue both sides鈥�. In contrast, Mark Manning, visiting the beach at the Welsh village of Llangennith, was abjured 鈥淪trictly no parking on both sides of the road鈥�.
A mathematically eminent reader, meanwhile, tells Feedback that such signs, including the 鈥渦se all doors鈥� on a train (16 June 2007), do in fact make sense. We pondered this, and realised that, to the people writing the instructions, traffic 鈥� whether vehicular or passenger 鈥� is much like a gas. It is only when we, as individual 鈥減articles鈥� in the traffic, 鈥渃ollapse鈥� the meaning of the sign into an instruction to us personally, that confusion arises. Probably.
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A sign near London Bridge station informs us that 鈥淣arrow lanes do not overtake cyclists鈥�. Steve Wilson wants to know whether narrow lanes overtake cars or buses
ARRIVING at the Crown Plaza hotel in Liverpool, UK, Karen Ashworth was confronted with a different quantum phenomenon. She was a little alarmed to face a sign instructing her to turn left for rooms 605 to 628 and right for rooms 601 to 606 鈥� especially since she had been allocated one of the two rooms with indeterminate location. She tried turning left by default and, thankfully, found her room without problem. But if she had turned to the right to look for her room would it have been there as well?
鈥淒o they revert, to some sort of quantum superposition state when not being actively observed?鈥� she muses. 鈥淎nd would that mean I might end up inadvertently sharing with whoever is in the other one as soon as we both go to sleep?鈥�
Football鈥檚 responsibility for climate change
CLIMATE change: we name the guilty parties. London鈥檚 Daily Telegraph may have been premature in fingering the UK鈥檚 energy and climate change minister Chris Huhne, as Feedback reported last year (24/31 December 2011). The subject, of course, rouses fierce passions. The latest fashion is for those who would call themselves 鈥渟ceptics鈥� to demand raw data and computer code from climate researchers.
Then they play with the numbers in their spreadsheets, aiming resolutely at the target of convincing themselves that whatever is causing the world to warm, it is not their carbon dioxide emissions 鈥� a process cruelly labelled 鈥渕athturbation鈥�.
Blogger Michael Brown decided to do his own fiddling. And lo! At you will find a demonstration that each appearance by the Manchester United football team in the FA Cup over an 11-year period raised global temperatures by 0.1掳C. There are graphs and everything.
So it must be true: the 11 players of Man U are between them responsible for at least half of global warming. Even better, adding cup appearances by Arsenal, Chelsea and Liverpool explained a whopping 180 per cent of the temperature change.
Implausible? Brown argues that the claims of climate sceptics are no more convincing.
Controlling crowds with damp clergy
SENIOR officers from London鈥檚 Metropolitan Police Service are, according to , reviewing how the force deals with large-scale disorder.
Possible techniques under discussion include 鈥渨ider use of water canons and baton guns鈥�.
Ian Moseley suspects that the 鈥渃annon鈥� mentioned in the headline would be rather more effective than the collection of damp clergy referred to in the story.
How to construct a non-doofy snowman
THE description of the invention covered by : 鈥淭he following is not a joke patent. It鈥檚 completely serious.鈥� Feedback finds this promising.
In the deep winter of 2006 Ignacio Asperas of Melville, New York, filed his application to patent an 鈥渁pparatus for facilitating the construction of a snow man/woman鈥�. He treats us to engaging details of his efforts to build snowpeople, which have generally looked 鈥渟ort of doofy鈥�. He goes on to describe his solution: a Van de Graaff generator inside a plastic sphere covered with dimples.
Roll this through dry snow, and electrostatic charge from the generator should make the snow stick to the sphere and form the perfect body for a snow figure.
There should be a circuit for automatically cutting off the charge generator 鈥渢o prevent shock鈥� the inventor writes with concern, because 鈥渋t would not do to zap little kiddies鈥�. But then as an afterthought he adds: 鈥淚 am sure it would not harm them, but I am thinking of greedy product liability attorneys.鈥�
Atheist鈥檚 afterlife appearance
FINALLY, while taken by the idea of a Global Atheist Convention, due to take place from 13 to 15 April, as advertised in our holiday issue (24/31 December 2011, p 7), Paul Griffiths notes that if Christopher Hitchens were to make his advertised appearance 鈥渋t might rather put a dampener on the event鈥�.
We imagine that the militant atheist Hitchens, who died on 15 December, would himself be put out to find himself making an afterlife appearance. Sadly, the unavoidable time lag between preparation of the advert and the ink drying provides a mundane explanation for the error.