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In The Chemistry Between Us, neuroscientist Larry Young and journalist Brian Alexander examine the neurobiological roots of love

THERE is a reason most of us sigh into our drinks when Cole Porter croons, 鈥淲hat is this thing called love?鈥� We understand his befuddlement all too well. (And let鈥檚 face it: if a man about town like Porter couldn鈥檛 figure out this whole love thing, what hope is there for the rest of us mere mortals?)

That鈥檚 why it is encouraging to know that in the past two decades social neuroscientists have been diligently working to unravel the mysteries of love 鈥� including the phenomena of attraction, monogamy and the parent-child bond 鈥� using techniques such as brain imaging, genome-wide association studies and transgenic animal models. In The Chemistry Between Us, Larry Young, the director of Emory University鈥檚 Center for Translational Social Neuroscience, and journalist Brian Alexander offer a novel take on many of those findings.

A few recent books, including my own, Dirty Minds, have chronicled love and sex-related efforts in neuroscience. One of the criticisms of many of these tomes is that they fail to take on the functional 鈥渨hy鈥� questions 鈥� why monogamy exists at all, for example, or why some people are more prone to infidelity. In The Chemistry Between Us, Young and Alexander do not shy away from proposing some strong hypotheses about the ways our neurobiology shapes our behaviour when it comes to the 鈥淟鈥� word.

Drawing on real stories as well as research, the authors take the reader on a fascinating journey through strip clubs, Romanian orphanages and labs where rodents are regularly stimulated with lubed paintbrushes. These myriad adventures provide a great context for the science 鈥� and cleverly illustrate all the ways in which love and sex can make changes to our brain chemistry.

While those who closely follow the latest neurobiological research concerning love and sex might not find many new studies in this mix, they will find a rather unique interpretation of how they all fit together.

Young, who is arguably one of most prolific researchers in the social neuroscience field, plants his flag firmly: he argues that love is truly an addiction and one to which none of us are immune. He takes a reductionist approach, focusing on molecules like dopamine, oxytocin and vasopressin, and examining how these chemicals exploit ancient neurobiological circuits.

Some may feel uncomfortable when Young and Alexander claim that sex tricks women into 鈥渂abysitting鈥� the men they love 鈥� nurturing them as they would their own infants, thanks to the goodly amounts of oxytocin released during the sex act by men hitting the cervix with their large penises and playing with their breasts. Sceptics probably won鈥檛 feel much better when Young and Alexander postulate that vasopressin helps men see their female partners as simply extensions of their territory.

鈥淪ex tricks women into 鈥榖abysitting鈥� the men they love 鈥� nurturing them as they would their infants鈥�

Still, the authors don鈥檛 back down. 鈥淢any would like to believe that such notions are outdated stereotypes,鈥� they write. 鈥淭hey鈥檙e not. We can fake it, but nature gets the last word.鈥� Not overly concerned with political correctness, Young and Alexander even go so far as to extend these hypotheses to touch on modern issues like marriage equality and single motherhood.

Yet, even if you are a wee bit sceptical about 鈥� or just weirded out by 鈥� Young and Alexander鈥檚 theories on how our brain chemistry translates into love, you are still in for one wild and entertaining ride. The prose in The Chemistry Between Us is lively and fun 鈥� and provides a fresh and unapologetically pointed analysis on what understanding the neurobiological correlates of love may mean for both our relationships and our culture.