Editorial: 鈥�MDMA TV: Turn on, tune in, do the research鈥�
See more in our gallery: 鈥�A wide-eyed view on being high inside an fMRI鈥�
My usual pick-me-up on a Monday morning is a cup of coffee. Today it鈥檚 going to be something very different.
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I鈥檝e been up since 6聽am. I鈥檝e had a breath test for alcohol, a urine test for drugs and a psychological test for mental health. Then I鈥檓 handed a red pill and a glass of water. I swallow it鈥� and I鈥檓 told to relax. Which is easier said than done when you don鈥檛 know if you鈥檝e just taken vitamin聽C or 83 milligrams of pure MDMA.
Half an hour later I鈥檓 inside an fMRI brain scanner, my head clamped in place and a visor over my face. It鈥檚 noisy and claustrophobic but I鈥檓 reassured by the panic button in my hand and a voice from the control room.
And then I start to feel it. A tingle of energy, like pins and needles, starts in the pit of my stomach and rises slowly, not unpleasant but not exactly pleasurable either. It builds in intensity, then breaks into a wave of bliss. The placebo effect can be powerful but when it happens again, I鈥檓 in no doubt. I鈥檓 coming up.
I鈥檓 taking part in a groundbreaking study on MDMA, the drug commonly known as ecstasy. The research is run by David Nutt of Imperial College London, a former government adviser and one of the few UK researchers licensed to study class-A drugs.
His main aim is to discover what MDMA does to the human brain, something that, remarkably, has never been done before. A second goal is to study MDMA as a therapy for post-traumatic stress disorder. The experiment is also being filmed for a Channel聽4 documentary called , which will be broadcast in the UK next week.
Over the next hour I ride ferocious surges of serotonin that balloon me higher and higher, while trying to focus on a series of tasks. The fMRI machine is going through its repertoire of rackets 鈥� rhythmic clankings, throaty roars and what sounds like organ music. At times I feel amazing, at others panicky. Keeping my head still is very, very hard. But I ride it out.
When I鈥檓 pulled out 90 minutes later, the drug effects have plateaued. My mind is clear, my movement feels smooth and, aside from some jaw clenching, I feel content and sociable. And surprisingly psychedelic: a purple door is throbbing before my eyes.
I perform psychological tests, but my heart isn鈥檛 in it. I鈥檓 more interested in chatting to the psychologists, doctors, nurses and porters. Finally I head home, and wake up the following day feeling pretty good.
, a member of Nutt鈥檚 team, later tells me they have now scanned 23 brains and have some preliminary results. While inside the machine, one of the tasks involved thinking about five of my most positive and negative memories. I rated these in terms of their vividness and associated emotion during the high and later that day.
The hypothesis was that MDMA would make the negative memories less painful. 鈥淲e saw a boosted brain response to positive memories, and a weaker response to negative ones,鈥� says Carhart-Harris. 鈥淚t fits the idea that MDMA can help people access negative memories without being overwhelmed by them and they might be able to change the way they feel about what happened.鈥�
A week after my first scan I return to go through the same procedure. As I swallow the pill I wonder briefly if last week was some kind of amazing placebo effect.
It wasn鈥檛.聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽聽
