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Feedback: Ingredient-free aphrodisiac

Sex thrills, stock exchange hiccups, gizzard salad and more
Feedback: Ingredient-free aphrodisiac
(Image: Paul McDevitt)

Ingredient-free aphrodisiac

REMEMBER how sex used to be? Then why not try Sublingual Human Growth Hormone to bring back the thrill?

Well, there are several reasons. Colin Smythe asks whether we can see anything that has scientific backing in the claims made for 鈥渟HGH鈥 at 鈥 claims such as: 鈥淏oth men and women have reported powerful aphrodisiac effects of HGH鈥 and that it 鈥渞ebuilds the body but also revitalises mental function鈥.

We were momentarily puzzled. Surely human growth hormone is tightly regulated when used medicinally? After all, the effects of excess include acromegaly 鈥 not a pleasant condition. But then we looked at the 鈥渋ngredients鈥 page and spotted the word 鈥渟uccussed鈥. A clue! It鈥檚 homeopathic. There are not necessarily any ingredients at all. You might just as well splash out 拢50 for a small bottle of water.

Then we read further. Just to be on the safe side, in case prosecutors don鈥檛 understand the concept of homeopathy, the salespeople include the puzzling statement that the 鈥渁mino acid sequence of the product is identical to that of human growth hormone of pituitary origin, while not actually being molecular Human Growth Hormone.鈥 So it both is, and is not, HGH?

Then they clarify that it 鈥渋s synthesized in a strain of Escherichia coli that has been modified by the addition of the gene for HGH鈥. So it鈥檚 ingredient-free, logically contradictory, and genetically engineered. Nice.

A colleague wanted to know how far the company鈥檚 office in south London was from the nearest underground station. told him it was 4.10795528787 kilometres

When a logarithm runs riot

DUSTING off the Feedback filing system, we came across an intriguing item from The Economist magazine for 4 August 2012, kindly forwarded by Roger Salmon. 鈥淭he New York Stock Exchange began an investigation into wild swings in 148 share prices that occurred over a 45-minute period,鈥 it reports. The swings were 鈥渢hought to be caused by an errant logarithm that emanated from Knight Capital鈥︹

For a moment we were puzzled 鈥 what would an 鈥渆rrant logarithm鈥 be like? Then we recalled the dire warnings from our mathematics teachers about not applying the logarithm function to negative numbers. A while later we learned that involve 鈥渋maginary鈥 numbers. Those certainly count as 鈥渆rrant鈥 for the purposes of share prices, and now we can imagine why our teachers warned a class of hormonal 13-year-olds against doing something that could threaten the stability of capitalism as a whole.

The Economist鈥榮 report caused a furore in the world鈥檚 financial centres, so the magazine two days later. Knight Capital, it explained, was actually trying to use an algorithm 鈥 although the effects on capitalism of doing that hardly seem to have been much safer in recent years.

Tracked before birth

WHEN James Ryan enabled Google鈥檚 Latitude service, he looked forward to seeing where his friends were from moment to moment on Google鈥檚 maps. He was disconcerted when Google informed him that his friend Kris was in Melrose, Massachusetts, 11,323 days ago.

鈥淭his,鈥 says James, 鈥渋s almost exactly 31 years. I suspect this will come as a shock to him, since he is only 27 years old. On the other hand, his mother is from Melrose. Was Google tracking her egg, I wonder? I鈥檓 sure that鈥檚 covered in the terms of service somewhere鈥︹

Dine on extinct shark

AS PART of his job with the European Union, Chris Torrero monitors the , which gives details of recalled food products, along with reasons for the recall.

He says that: 鈥淭he reason stated for Alert Reference 2012.CJV was perhaps unusual.鈥

It was: 鈥淚ncorrect labelling (species mentioned on the label is extinct for millions of years) on frozen shark fillets (Carcharocles megalodon) from China鈥.

Caviar of hedgehog

SEVERAL readers have kindly explained the menu item 鈥淪alad of Gizzards and His Chestnuts鈥 that so puzzled Richard Green and his party in France (5 January).

Says Henry Shipley, for example: 鈥淚t is likely that the item was Salade de g茅siers et ses marrons (or possibly ses ch芒taignes). 骋茅蝉颈别谤蝉 (gizzards) are a popular food in France, very often served warm in a salad, and the usage 鈥樷et son/sa/ses鈥︹ is common in restaurants and is best translated as 鈥榳ith鈥. So the party missed out on gizzard and chestnut salad.鈥

Other readers who concurred with this explanation added that the dish is 鈥渧ery good鈥. One wonders if the same can be said of the Tripes Alsaciennes that Martin Withington found translated for the benefit of English visitors to Alsace as 鈥淎lsation Guts鈥; or the 鈥渃aviar of hedgehog鈥 that Paul Ticher encountered, this time in Spain, which he worked out probably meant 鈥渟ea-urchin eggs鈥, and which he declined to sample.

Determinedly masculine

FINALLY, thanks to all the readers whose French is better than ours and who pointed out that what we called 鈥la d茅terminisme nominative鈥 in that same issue (5 January) should have been 鈥le d茅terminisme nominatif鈥.

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