by Neil F. Comins, Columbia University Press
THERE are some journeys that, although you are aware they exist, you don鈥檛 ever expect to make. Diving to the bottom of the Mariana trench, perhaps, or circumnavigating the world. And then there are some you probably have no desire to undertake. Travelling alone across the ice by sled to the South Pole in midwinter, maybe, or crossing the Sahara on foot. But if you really, really had to go ahead with any of them, you would want to know you were in very safe hands.
Fortunately Neil F. Comins has such hands. He is at the University of Maine鈥檚 department of physics and astronomy, and what he doesn鈥檛 know about space travel and its effects on the average human isn鈥檛 worth a handful of stardust.
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If space travel is to become commonplace, trippers will be keen to know what to pack, the kind of experiences they are likely to face and how it will feel. Key among the last of these is adapting to weightlessness, which gets a whole chapter. This may be just as well since there鈥檚 a lot to learn about the topic: eating, moving around and having sex are all very different in space. And, of course, you have to go to the toilet. As Comins says, 鈥渦rine and feces don鈥檛 [just] go down鈥�, they go everywhere. Be careful.
Then when you鈥檝e finally got used to doing what once came naturally, the trip will be over. Thankfully, the final chapter offers hints and tips about adapting to life back on Earth, where you鈥檒l find it difficult to stand and tricky talking to family and friends who haven鈥檛 been through what you have 鈥� it鈥檚 psychologically and socially disorienting, and deeply disruptive. As for sex, up there, the lack of weight means more positions are comfortable; on Earth, it鈥檚 back to the boring old ways, presumably.
鈥淪pace travellers revert to childhood, becoming as territorial as they might have been with siblings鈥�
In addition to the erotic and the exotic, Comins covers sleep disturbance (space travel is way noisier than you might expect) and problems with smells (plastics really leach gases 鈥� recall that 鈥渘ew car smell鈥� and decide if you can cope with it, not to mention the odours of your fellow travellers, for months). And then there鈥檚 the sheer boredom of being somewhere with so little to do: space travel sounds exciting, but there鈥檚 a hell of a lot of sitting around while you do it.
The chapter on making the most of experiences in space tells you what to look out for on Mars as you pass by, why you should do a crash course in geology before you go (Apollo 15 astronaut David Scott discovered moon rocks that were 4.5 billion years old because he paid attention in class), and which sports are best played on the moon. Here, golf and soccer work well because, despite the balls going higher and further than on Earth, they still return to the surface.
Comins also covers things you would never have considered. For example, space travellers tend to revert to childhood, becoming as territorial as they might once have been with their siblings. Disputes can break out if one person inches their gear into another鈥檚 personal, er, space, so demarcation zones should be clearly assigned before launch.
The Traveler鈥檚 Guide to Space is a delight, and the fact that few of its readers will ever need to use it doesn鈥檛 diminish its pleasures. Difficult terrestrial journeys will remain just that. However, after reading this guide, space will sound far more fun than our planet鈥檚 offerings 鈥� but also more challenging and perplexing than you could have expected.
Don鈥檛 leave Earth without it.
This article appeared in print under the headline 鈥淪pace, the final holiday frontier鈥�
