杏吧原创

Feedback: Scentless perfumes and houses that last forever

Feedback is our weekly column of bizarre stories, implausible advertising claims, confusing instructions and more

Frisbee plate

No more square meals

NEWS that mathematicians may find a little hard to digest. Shane Bennison finds the i newspaper, among others, reporting the invention of a rippled, Frisbee-like plate for dieters. The i explains that 鈥渢he plate has ridges and troughs that reduce its overall surface area therefore cutting down the amount of food that can be piled on it鈥.

If this technology is transferable, says Shane, 鈥淚 assume slimmers can reduce their own surface area by folding any spare skin as they lose weight.鈥 We鈥檙e not sure if hyperbolic tableware would help us shed the kilos, though return trips to the kitchen to replenish the dish might burn some calories. If not, you could always use the plate as a handy 3D prop for explaining gravitational waves, an inevitable byproduct of shifting mass.

Love all

SOMETHING smells fishy about the bottle of perfume John Boyle discovered. The 鈥渉olistic fragrance鈥 from Josie Maran is an eau de parfum named Love, which proclaims itself to be unscented and contain no alcohol. That鈥檚 love in the sense of zero, then, Feedback presumes.

鈥溾滱lcohol purchased in M&S cannot be consumed anywhere inside or outside these premises,鈥 says a sign spotted by Juliet Casey. Aimed at responsible alcohol consumption, she presumes鈥

Higher dimensions

ADVENTURES in multiple dimensions: 鈥淗ilary Johnson鈥檚 7D submarine experience has a long way to go before it beats the record,鈥 says Ian Simmons (20 May). 鈥淥ne of my film suppliers told me of a 36D ride he鈥檇 encountered in Korea. Apparently, they got there by counting every single special effect as an extra dimension, as well as each axis of movement of the seats.鈥

Letters of note

OUR inbox continues to be peppered with retronyms 鈥 words made by attempts to sound out the letters of acronyms. 鈥淥ne Dutch example that springs to mind is the word elpee, pronounced el-pay,鈥 says Govert Schilling. 鈥淚t is the Dutch pronunciation of the letters LP, a 12-inch vinyl record.鈥

Off course

HOWEVER, as our readers giveth, they also taketh away. 鈥淛eep is not really a retronym,鈥 says Martin van Raay, 鈥渁s contrary to popular belief, there was no US Army acronym GP for 鈥榞eneral purpose鈥 vehicle鈥 (13 May).

He provides two overlapping alternative ideas: first that the word jeep stems from Army slang for a new recruit, and second, 鈥渢he Popeye cartoon character Eugene the Jeep, which could do all kinds of tricks.鈥

Martin says that during development, Ford did refer to the car as GP (G for 鈥済overnment鈥, P, incomprehensibly, for 鈥渞econnaissance vehicle with an 80-inch wheelbase鈥). 鈥淎fter the first press presentation of the new vehicle, the soldier driving it replied to a reporter鈥檚 question 鈥榃hat is it?鈥 with the words: 鈥業t鈥檚 a jeep!鈥 Probably meaning it鈥檚 a new vehicle, and also likely referring to Popeye, because the new car really could do wondrous things off-road.鈥

Unmentionables

STAYING with military terms, Peter Norton writes that during the second world war, the US Navy construction battalions were referred to as Seabees.

He also uncovers a strange exile from the world of abbreviations: 鈥渢he dual medical specialty of obstetrics and gynaecology is often abbreviated to Ob-Gyn. But instead of being pronounced that way in the US, it is spoken out as 鈥榦h-bee-gee-wy-en鈥.鈥 In the UK, the same department is often referred to as Obs and Gynae. A touch inelegant, perhaps, but when it comes to contractions, who are we to argue with the experts?

Mega-market

PREVIOUSLY Feedback puzzled over the attention to detail displayed by Virgin Mobile鈥檚 accounting team, which calculated John Culver鈥檚 bill to 16 decimal places (13 May). 鈥淕lobal annual GDP is almost US$80 trillion, which means it is approaching 1016 US cents,鈥 says Hillary Shaw. 鈥淪o if Virgin Mobile has ambitions to produce everything in the world, for everybody, it will indeed need 16 decimal places in its accounting to be accurate to the last cent.鈥

Feedback suspects the UK Competition and Markets Authority might have something to say about this, if Virgin doesn鈥檛 take it over as well.

House of Theseus

house cartoon

YOU can pre-order the latest invention from Tony Stark cosplayer Elon Musk, a solar roof tile that generates electricity (the ideal peripheral for anyone who bought one of his electric roadsters). 鈥淲e offer the best warranty in the industry,鈥 proclaims the website, 鈥渢he lifetime of your house, or infinity, whichever comes first.鈥

Michael Zehse, perhaps planning to put this guarantee to the test, says: 鈥淚 wonder how they define house. You could keep replacing bits of the house and adding stuff until there鈥檚 nothing left of the original, would one still be living in the same house?鈥

And if you could find suppliers willing to offer the same guarantee for walls, tiles, roof frames and so on, would your house survive to the heat death of the universe?

Where the sun doesn鈥檛 shine

READERS may recall Feedback鈥檚 campaign to have glow-in-the-dark glitter added to dog food to make walking the streets less hazardous (13 May). We may have been scooped, says Tony Donaldson. 鈥淟ooking for glow-worms in dark places in Devon, I found glowing patches, which I identified as bird poo.鈥

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