Internet giant Amazon has attracted criticism in recent years for the minimal tax it pays on a business worth billions a year. All above board, it goes without saying. Now, while browsing for awnings on amazon.co.uk鈥檚 page, Alan Wells has stumbled on the company employing non-conventional mathematics in a different context.
鈥淟ooking at the reviews, I saw that it had been given a mean score of 3.1 out of 5 from two reviews, which on further examination resulted from one review of 5 stars and one review of 1 star,鈥� he writes. To help explain matters, a bar chart was also provided, which recorded that 53 per cent of the two reviews had awarded five stars, and 47 per cent had given a one star.
鈥淐an anybody explain the maths to me?鈥� he asks. We can鈥檛, Alan 鈥� but then our tax bill this year was eye-watering.
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Tangerine dream
From inexplicable mathematics to unexplained science. It is well known that US president Donald Trump鈥檚 environmental concerns don鈥檛 extend much further than potential locations for his next golf course, but a speech at a policy retreat in Baltimore shed new light not just on his anti-green stance, but also his strange skin hue.
During a 70-minute speech to captive Republicans, the president railed against energy-saving light bulbs, : 鈥淭he light bulb. People said what鈥檚 with the light bulb? I said here鈥檚 the story. And I looked at it, the bulb that we鈥檙e being forced to use, number one to me, most importantly, the light鈥檚 no good. I always look orange. And so do you. The light is the worst.鈥�
He didn鈥檛 explain in detail how this curious photochemistry works, but Feedback notes that Trump isn鈥檛 alone. There is something about energy-saving light bulbs that induces a mysterious redshift in the complexion of a certain type of person. As far as the US commander-in-chief is concerned, he has often been accused of gaslighting the nation; perhaps it was only a matter of time before he really did blame the lights.
Bright spark
More light on a dark place. 鈥淚 have been trying to find a use for the many thousands of damaged laser crystals that exist in physical science laboratories, and this seems to be one way forward,鈥� chemist Tony Stace writes. He supplies photos of an elegant pendant and set of earrings in white gold, mounted in which are crystals taken from the heart of a solid-state laser.
In natural light, the traces of neodymium they contain create a faint pink-purple hue perfect for communicating ideas of love. Alternatively, if you pump light into them with a flash tube emitting at 900 nanometres, you will stimulate emissions in the infrared.
It seems obvious when you think about it to link these two uses of rare metals and exotic crystals. Rather than gathering dust, your scientific kit can be upcycled into fetching jewellery. A talking point at any scientific dinner party!
But why stop there, we wonder. Laboratories come stocked with all kinds of esoteric kit destined to fall into disuse: we鈥檇 love to hear your stories of the curious afterlives of scientific equipment.
Emergency buzzing
In its eternal battle to subjugate humankind, robotkind has developed a new and troubling strategy. On Twitter, Jess Kidding discovers the following warning on a new appliance: 鈥淕OOVI Robot Vacuum Cleaner will emit a series of bees when it is in trouble,鈥� before adding unhelpfully, 鈥減lease refer more solution with User Manual in Troubleshooting鈥�.
Who approved this apian alert system? How many bees are involved, and how does releasing them help? We suggest you don鈥檛 try to find out, but accompany your GOOVI wherever it goes, and do everything you can so it leads a trouble-free life. No, wait 鈥� is that just what they want you to do?
Climate change bites
A Swedish economist has suggested eating human flesh to combat climate change. Magnus S枚derlund floated the idea, tongue in cheek (two of the tastiest cuts), at the Gastro Summit in Stockholm, noting that survival in a climate-ravaged world rests on marketing types convincing us to develop an appetite for new sources of protein.
Readers with longer memories will recall that the satirist Jonathan Swift made a similar in the 18th century, that the Irish poor should feed their children to the English rich. That one didn鈥檛 fly 鈥� but then they didn鈥檛 have marketing departments back then.
Water, water鈥�
Our nominative determinism pot runneth over. Paul Kitcatt (four fingers on each hand, we imagine), spots How to Read the Weather by Storm Dunlop. We furrow our brow, consult our leather-bound tomes and consider that this may be the same Storm Dunlop who has written on such subjects in our own pages, and insists his name did not predispose him to it.
Meanwhile, Chris Evans notes a recent article on European flood risk features one Emanuele Bevacqua (28 September, p 18), whose surname is Italian for 鈥渄rink water鈥�. 鈥淎 possible solution to the problem?鈥� asks Chris. And browsing , Martin Malec discovers that Scotland鈥檚 Rural College is working to breed sheep that produce less greenhouse gas. The geneticist in charge? Nicola Lambe.
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