杏吧原创

Paper chase

Feedback鈥檚 mind was recently blown by an unlikely source 鈥� from the UK鈥檚 National Cyber Security Centre. The interesting bit wasn鈥檛 the headlines that it now has to combat malicious emails disguised as coronavirus updates. No, the most surprising news was that until this year, the cryptographic keys sent to military bases were in the form of spools of punched paper.

That鈥檚 right 鈥� the same method that was first developed as an input tool for programmable looms in the 18th century, taking the term 鈥渓egacy IT鈥� to a new level. Apparently, the punched paper keys were hard to replace because they had such a in a wide range of infrastructure.

But watch out, cybercriminals! After years of effort, keys are now sent out in Top Secret, electronic form 鈥� and that doesn鈥檛 mean a floppy disc with the password stuck on the side. Military cryptographers will presumably be glad to see the back of the old punched-paper versions, with one industry source describing them to as 鈥渁ll a bit 1960s really鈥�.

Fax axe

Speaking of anachronistic tech, 2020 was supposed to be the year that UK hospitals stopped using fax machines. For younger readers, sending a fax was like sending an email if you first had to print it out on a sheet of paper, then slowly feed it into a moaning typewriter. It was all the rage in the 1980s, but so were shoulder pads.

Two years ago, the world鈥檚 biggest purchaser of fax machines were the UK鈥檚 various National Health Service bodies. The country鈥檚 politicians often claim the publicly funded healthcare system is world-beating, but this probably isn鈥檛 what they meant.

When UK health secretary Matt Hancock 鈥� who is such a big fan of modern tech that he has his own app 鈥� learned of the state of affairs, he banned English hospitals from buying any more fax machines. NHS trusts would also be monitored quarterly until they were 鈥溾��.

Yet it is hard to break a habit. A report last year said many hospitals weren鈥檛 phasing out fax machines fast enough to meet the target of April this year, and two had even their fax machine collection. With hospital managers now presumably busy with other matters, there doesn鈥檛 seem to be much hope things will improve.

Feedback would love to hear readers鈥� experiences of having to reply on anachronistic tech. The most ridiculous will get a prize 鈥� delivered by carrier pigeon.

On me 鈥榚d

New technology sometimes creates new problems, though. When lockdown stopped fans attending football matches, Inverness Caledonian Thistle Football Club in Scotland proudly announced that it would livestream the team鈥檚 games using an automatic camera with AI-driven ball-tracking technology.

Unfortunately, the high-tech system was foiled in a recent match in which one of the assistant referees was, er, follicularly challenged. The man鈥檚 bald head was confused for the football and the camera repeatedly cut away from the action to zoom in on his pate, causing a crucial goal to be missed.

Pixellot, the firm that makes the camera system, says it happened because the camera angle made it seem like the man鈥檚 head was inside the pitch. helpfully explained that problems like this can arise because AI is 鈥渂rittle鈥�, which means it sometimes malfunctions in unexpected ways.

Praying for help

Not too unexpected, we hope, or 鈥� depending on our religious inclinations 鈥� pray. Folks on Twitter were bemused to see that no less a personage than Pope Francis has taken an interest in machine learning. Each month, @pontifex asks the world to join in prayers for a specific goal. This year, for instance, subjects have included help for migrants and world peace.

Unusually, the for November was AI. 鈥淲e pray that the progress of robotics and artificial intelligence may always serve humankind,鈥� he said. Feedback can sympathise. When the antiquated computer system in the stationery cupboard starts malfunctioning, we often feel like praying too. But the Pope鈥檚 choice of words left some wondering: what does he know about AI progress that the rest of us don鈥檛?

Timing is everything

The announcement this month of promising early results for Pfizer and BioNTech鈥檚 coronavirus vaccine led to widespread rejoicing in most quarters 鈥� but not all.

Some in US president Donald Trump鈥檚 campaign were suspicious of the timing, with the findings being released a few days after the election on 3 November. During his campaign, Trump said a vaccine may arrive before voting day, so an earlier announcement could have boosted him. 鈥淣othing nefarious about the timing of this at all,鈥� tweeted his son Donald Trump Jr, once again demonstrating the pressing need for a universally accepted sarcasm emoji.

Compared with some of the other baseless conspiracy theories about the coronavirus, it is hardly the wackiest. But if Trump Jr is right, it would be the first time, to Feedback鈥檚 knowledge, that a pharmaceutical firm has been accused of suppressing research findings about its products that are positive. Big Pharma is usually accused of bending the truth in the other direction.

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