杏吧原创

David Ebenbach

Tachyon Publications

IN 2012, a Dutch group announced a novel plan for financing the literally astronomical costs of setting up a base on Mars: the firm would sell the TV rights for the selection and training of the would-be astronauts and the colonisation process too.

While there was massive public interest and more than 4000 people worldwide applied to be part of what was admitted to be a one-way mission, the company involved, Mars One Ventures, seemed out of its depth and went bankrupt in 2019. Now the idea lives on in fiction, in the form of How to Mars, the debut sci-fi novel from David Ebenbach.

The book explores with both humour and pathos the consequences of humanity leaving the challenging task of extraterrestrial colonisation to a TV company focused on ratings and sponsorship opportunities. The pitfalls are obvious from the start. During the selection process, the firm, Destination Mars!, seems less interested in finding people with the 鈥渞ight stuff鈥� than in creating a telegenic melting pot.

Scandinavian Stefan, who speaks almost accentless English, is secretly told to 鈥渟ound more Danish鈥�, leaving him suspicious of the accents of his competitors. During the training programme in an Australian desert, another applicant is ejected for making the mistake of 鈥渂reaking the fourth wall鈥�, or speaking to the camera.

鈥淭he Mars settlers are in a vulnerable position: their survival depends on the goodwill of a TV company鈥�

As the book opens, the six scientists at the colony are two years into their mission and all is not well. The crew members have become bored 鈥� of each other, the monotonous food and the never-changing scenery.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, viewers are bored too, which means the team suffers the indignity of the show being cancelled for poor ratings. The TV company has no incentive to move to Stage Two: sending out the next batch of colonists and terraforming Mars. The crew鈥檚 handlers on Earth have been suspiciously quiet about that side of things for a while.

The settlers are in a vulnerable position: their survival depends on the goodwill of a company on which they are now just a financial drain. When they disagree about something with a handler, she sets them straight: 鈥淒o you realize that you don鈥檛 even get to eat unless we send you food?鈥�

Fortunately for the story, the colonists鈥� lives soon take a more interesting turn, bringing fresh challenges as well as the return of TV viewers.

The humour has shades of Douglas Adams, whose The 贬颈迟肠丑丑颈办别谤鈥檚 Guide to the Galaxy series excelled at satirising the frustrations of ordinary people battling faceless bureaucracy. In Ebenbach鈥檚 novel, Destination Mars! saddles the colonists with towels that aren鈥檛 absorbent because they bear enormous company logos.

But on the whole, How to Mars is a more serious read than 贬颈迟肠丑丑颈办别谤鈥檚, exploring themes such as bereavement and mental illness. One crew member鈥檚 turmoil in particular is portrayed with convincing realism.

Indeed, a genuine fear for Earth鈥檚 real-life space agencies is that future missions to Mars may be jeopardised by the astronauts coming to hate each other. This has been , where crews are isolated for months in sealed habitats.

So far, no space agencies have turned any such projects into reality TV. If How to Mars is any guide, let鈥檚 hope they never do.