Solar system agronomy
Could we grow endangered plants on other planets? We pause and consider this question. No.
Still, since this query is the subject line of a PR email from an online flower-delivery service, handed to us by a colleague with a pair of tongs and a disparaging look, we find it worthy of further consideration. Even more so since we are promised conclusions reached 鈥渦sing research and working with a designer鈥�.
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鈥淭oday, nearly 40% of the world鈥檚 plants are endangered, according to a report from the Royal Botanic Gardens, Kew,鈥� we read. . But never fear, once we have destroyed Earth鈥檚 ecosystems, a bright, green future exists elsewhere in the solar system, at least in the world of whirly-eyed PR.
鈥淎s the soil on Mars has double the amount of iron than soil on planet earth, leafy green vegetables and microgreens would easily thrive there,鈥� we learn. Dandelions, too, apparently 鈥� a species far from endangered on Feedback鈥檚 small patch of terra firma. 鈥淗ops vine [sic], trees, shrubs and poison ivy might be able to survive the challenging temperatures on this moon鈥�, it opines of Jupiter鈥檚 satellite Europa, where days struggle to rise above -135掳C and surface radiation levels are around 2000 times those on Earth. 鈥淥ne of the only things that can kill poison ivy is boiling water 鈥� so the cold and wet conditions on Europa seem to be the ideal environment for this plant.鈥�
The outlook is even rosier on Titan, the Saturnian moon where water ice at around -180掳C fulfils the function of bedrock, and great surface lakes are filled with liquid natural gas. 鈥淭itan鈥檚 surface is sculpted by methane and ethane, which only one other planet in the solar system has: Earth. Therefore, tobacco plants should grow on this moon too鈥�, our correspondent concludes, non-sequentially.
鈥淧lease let me know if you have any questions鈥�, the email ends. So, so many, including where we get some of the wacky Europa baccy too. Optimism is a fine, fine thing, but as far as the future of life on Earth is concerned, we fear the rationalist鈥檚 counterstatement applies: .
Bog standards
鈥淲e are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars鈥�, as one of the usual suspects once wrote. Or we are all in the gutter, sending in responses to our recent item on peculiar toilet signage (31 July).
鈥淭oilets and viewing area鈥� was an unfortunate juxtaposition that confronted Richard Ellam at an Aberdeen Science Festival some years back, while Chris Evans relays that 鈥淎 lay-by eatery near where I live (on the A59 between Skipton and Clitheroe) for some years displayed a sign reading 鈥楽it-in or take-away toilet'鈥� 鈥� neither of which seems particularly practicable or desirable.
Hazardous fore play
Our item on the newly introduced crocodile hazard at the Royal Port Moresby Golf Club in Papua New Guinea (14 August) reminds Stuart Reeves in Wake Forest, North Carolina, of playing at the .
Its 鈥渓ocal rules鈥� include such gems as 鈥淏urrowing animals 鈥� Rough/Fairway drop without penalty from holes made by burrowing animals and termites, NOT HOOF MARKS. Burrowing animals include warthogs, moles and termites鈥�.
Other rules (鈥渇ormal and informal鈥�) that Stuart has encountered on his travels include 鈥淕ive way to a herdsman and his cows crossing the fairway; free drop from a hippopotamus footprint; free drop about 3 club lengths if the ball lands in the coils of a snake (no need to be precise); if a monkey steals your ball it is a lost ball鈥�. Strong stuff 鈥� and further congratulations on your self-confessed status as a 鈥渞ecovering golfer鈥�.
Transcendental number
Mentions in Almost the last word (14 August) of 鈥渋nteresting numbers, numbers with their own Wiki page and the fine-structure constant (approximately 1/137) prompted me to recheck the , writes Mike Sargent, displaying the talent for the tangent that we so admire among Feedback readers. 鈥淚t has for several years now informed us that 鈥榃olfgang Pauli, a pioneer of quantum physics, died in a hospital room numbered 137, a coincidence that disturbed him鈥�.鈥�
鈥淚t is difficult to know which is more surprising, that Pauli鈥檚 consciousness transcended death, or that he then contrived to communicate his feelings on his demise to a Wiki page editor,鈥� he continues. We don鈥檛 wish to sound too woo, but it is a fundamental tenet of quantum mechanics that information cannot be destroyed, and 鈥淧hysics might create a backdoor to an afterlife 鈥� but don鈥檛 bank on it鈥� is the headline of an article we see in our webspace starting from that basis. We would say that鈥檚 living proof, but that鈥檚 possibly not quite right.
Last laugh
Casting our all-seeing eye over our shoulder, we see that our neighbours and friends in Almost the last word (backwards readers: you鈥檒l find it towards the front) are discussing how a photon 鈥渒nows鈥� to travel at the speed of light.
With the privilege of having the actual last word, we must give the obvious missing answer: because it is very bright.
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