Can this cable turn water into wine?
ALMOST three years ago Japanese electronics giant Denon offered hi-fi enthusiasts the chance to pay $499 for a short length of computer network cable, usually costing only a few dollars (23 July 2008). The claim was that the cable 鈥渢horoughly eliminates adverse effects from vibration鈥�.
We never did get a clear explanation of how vibration can affect digits running through a cable. But it seems the price was a bargain, because the AKDL1 cable is now on sale at at $9999 new or $999 used (plus $4.99 for shipping).
Advertisement
Hi-fi fans have not been indifferent to the cable鈥檚 qualities. They have turned Amazon鈥檚 customer comments pages, at , into a paean of ironic praise for these bits of wire, with well over 400 reviews.
Recent postings include this from DMan: 鈥淚 filled a large glass with ordinary tap water and carefully dipped the doubled-over cable in. The whole glass turned instantly dark, red and more viscous. A quick taste and both my friend and I agreed that it was the finest tasting red wine we鈥檇 ever encountered.鈥�
This comes from jmf: 鈥淓ver since I started using the cable鈥� my light sabre skills have improved dramatically, much to the awe of my Master. I am able to jump from an anti-gravitational car running at full speed onto another, all the time dodging a laser gun.鈥�
Perhaps most startling is what happened when Philip Spertus connected his cable to an iPod: 鈥淎fter listening to the entirety of Beethoven鈥檚 9th Symphony I went on to listen to his 10th, something that I have never been able to accomplish with the lower quality ethernet cord that I had previously been using.鈥�
鈥淔rom Abu Dhabi, Marc Smith-Evans sends a photo of a hat 鈥� or possibly two quantum hats, since it is/they are made of 鈥�100 per cent Cotton; 100 per cent Polyester鈥�
READER Paul Brown sends us a link to an enchanting photo taken by Joe Dunckley of , in south-west England, with a sign which reads, in its entirety: 鈥淪ign not in use.鈥�
How would that convey a different message to the absence of a sign? We appreciate that the sign may return to use, but is there a rule forbidding its removal, leaving a post without a sign, or indeed neither sign nor post, in the interim? Did no one think 鈥渉ang on鈥�?鈥� when they received the order to assemble this sign 鈥� which they did beautifully, we must say.
So many questions, and we haven鈥檛 even started on the epistemological implications of the fact that the sign that is 鈥渘ot in use鈥� is now most definitely in use.
TALKING of signs, Gordon Woolcock was intrigued by one outside a 鈥淐omplementary Health Care Centre鈥� in Norwich, UK, offering 鈥淗omeopathic education鈥�. How does that work? Does it, in the tradition of homeopathy itself, consist of undetectably small amounts of factual education diluted by large quantities of content-free nonsense?
Gordon points out the fantastic opportunities for savings on education budgets this could mean. On a more personal note, he adds: 鈥淢aybe I could learn to play guitar by listening to white noise 24 hours a day and glancing at a picture of Eric Clapton once a month.鈥�
Notice for people who aren鈥檛 there
STILL on this theme, those familiar with the Australian electoral system will no doubt understand this, but lacking such knowledge ourselves we sympathise with Norm Cleland鈥檚 supposition that the Australian Electoral Commission has fallen under the influence of quantum theory. During the recent Victoria state elections it put up a sign at Norm鈥檚 local polling station that read: 鈥淎bsent voters queue here鈥�.
FUTURISTIC technology is wonderful, isn鈥檛 it? Michael Forbes now has a car fitted with Microsoft鈥檚 Sync software, so that he can use voice commands to interact with his MP3 player and cellphone. 鈥淥nce it thinks it knows what I said,鈥� he explains, 鈥渋t repeats back to me what it thinks it heard.鈥�
Feedback is somewhat reassured that the system is not yet as advanced as those word-perfect, initially obedient computers portrayed in science fiction movies (think HAL in 2001: A Space Odyssey). Michael recently suffered much frustration trying to get it to recognise that he wanted to play the song Radio Ga Ga by Queen. After three or four attempts, the software finally reached into its dictionary of abbreviations and repeated: 鈥淧lay track radio gallium gallium鈥�.
Michael wonders whether Freddie Hg should get the credit for this composition.
FINALLY, something different. Adam Marshall notes that the pink Himalayan salt discussed in Feedback (18 December 2010) is said to be 250 million years old. But buyers should beware, he says: The use-by date is May 2013.