FEEDBACK readers are becoming notorious for reading the small print. This may be upsetting to those who comfortably assume that no one does, and so believe that threats of failure to comply being dealt with by a 鈥渓eather winged demon of the night鈥� may suffice (16 December 2006).
鈥淭he euro 鈥渃ame under fresh attack鈥� dropping below 鈧�1.25鈥� UK newspaper The Guardian . Brian Reffin Smith thinks being 1.01 of itself would be impressive enough鈥�
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Alistair Anderson has thus perused the purchase for this year鈥檚 Olympic Games in London. He highlights the part of clause 19.2.3 prohibiting 鈥渂ottles or containers made of glass or other material鈥� being taken into any venue. 鈥淪pectators wishing to bring their own food and drink,鈥� he suggests, 鈥渕ay need to invest in virtual bottles or other containers 鈥� barring a better suggestion.鈥�
Interfering with orderly execution
THE problem goes deeper. There is in any case a blanket ban on taking in 鈥渇ood (save for baby food), alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages (save for baby milk and other valid medical reasons)鈥�.
This implies a much more specific problem: how is one to transport baby milk, or other food or drink necessitated by a (valid) allergy to absolutely all the offerings of the Games鈥檚 valued partner corporations?
These run to 7140 words by our count, including a 鈥渓ist of prohibited and restricted behaviour鈥� that includes 鈥渁ny activity related to marketing or advertising鈥� and 鈥渁ctivity or protest related to unions, political or religious subjects鈥︹��
Feedback fears that even if brandishing an immaterial baby-milk container isn鈥檛 specifically mentioned in this list, it may still 鈥渋nterfere鈥� with the orderly execution of a Session鈥�.
And what is one to do if the baby milk is contained in a structure which is material, and forms part of one鈥檚 chest?
SPOTTED by Mark Long in an advert for Samsung鈥檚 SA200 monitor: 鈥淭he ultimate energy saving measure has been created by Samsung with the new Adaptor On Off mode. By simply flicking the mechanical switch found on the Samsung LED Business monitor SA200, you can cut energy output while not using the monitor down to an amazing 0 Watts.鈥�
鈥淎mazing indeed!鈥� says Mark, lost in admiration. 鈥淚t鈥檚 got an OFF switch!鈥� 鈥� as recommended in Feedback (31 March).
ADMIRABLE is the spirit of scientific curiosity evinced by a paper in the Journal of Morphology entitled 鈥溾��. It sets out to discover whether snakes have necks.
It concludes: 鈥渕yological features characterising the neck in quadrupedal [scaled reptiles]鈥� are retained in all examined snakes, contradicting the complete lack of the neck in snakes hypothesised in previous studies.鈥�
RADLETT, a settlement north of London, has installed electronic information screens at bus stops. Kay Bagon sends a photo of one, which enables residents to benefit, through state-of-the-art satellite technology, from the message: 鈥淧lease refer to timetable鈥�.
The metropolis to the south is now almost fully equipped with such signs. Initially, Feedback was occasionally startled to be told that buses were bound for 鈥淣o destination鈥�. The existential, not to say cosmological, implications were mind-boggling.
Someone behind the scenes presumably concluded that this worked better as a message to the computer program (鈥渨e have no destination information for this vehicle鈥�) than to humans. So the non-message now reads: 鈥淣o information鈥�. What, no bits at all?
FINALLY, Feedback finds it useful, when dealing with digital devices, to bear in mind that there may be an error in the error message. It gets more complicated with the message Kathi Hori saw on her iPod about a 鈥淨uantum chronological asynchrony error鈥� (12 May)
Kathi has discovered that the message was not in fact supplied by Apple, but turns up when she tries to open a link in a footnote to an essay on the Mormon blog on the experimental writer Gilda Trillim. We are not sure how it ended up on Kathi鈥檚 iThing screen.
Interestingly, Trillim and her nicely titled A Slouch in the Shoulders of Deity appear to exist only on that site. We suspect that may change, just as humorist Flann O鈥橞rien鈥檚 much-footnoted fictional authority .
The essay on 鈥淭rillim鈥� appears to be by Stephen Peck, an at Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah. We are now, though, so deeply nested in layers of non-factual literature that we are liable to believe almost anything.
Except we are still a bit doubtful that Apple鈥檚 User Experience Quality Control managers would have allowed programmer humour to make its way into production.